Workshop

Note: About 15 years ago I won a contest at a local college in which the grand prize was getting to attend a poetry workshop conducted by a rather well-known (Pulitzer prize winning) poet named Stephen Dunn. The day of the workshop I showed up rather inebriated (I guess maybe I thought this would impress Mr. Dunn, I don’t know) (it didn’t) with a cocky, superior, looking down my nose at you attitude and proceeded to read a spur of the moment poem about women at the DMV. I honestly didn’t expect much of a discussion after I read it but much to my surprise/amusement (and horror) it generated this big discussion about technical and political correctness, led primarily by another rather well-known poet named Diane (her real name shall forever remain unnamed). I remember looking over at Stephen Dunn during the discussion who gave me a ‘now you understand what I have to deal with’ look. Later the poem ‘Workshop’ came about as a result of that experience. Following are the original ‘A Day at the DMV’ that started the fiasco and ‘Workshop’.


                                                         A Day at the DMV

I like
strong and confident women,
with deep lusty voices
who call me ‘Hon’;
you usually find them
at service counters,
they always seem to know the answers
to everything,
I often wonder why
they’re not running a company somewhere,
or deciding the fate
of third world countries;

I’m sure they’d do a much better job
than the yahoos doing those kind of things now.

But I guess it’s just as well,
if they were tied up
solving all the world’s problems,
it would take forever
to renew my license
at the DMV.

                                                              Workshop

I thought about writing again,
but then I got a stomachache,
so I thought;

to hell with it,

besides,
what would it prove?

I really don’t care
to be psycho-analyzed
by some middle aged, mildly attractive,
poet wannabe named Diane,
searching for meaning
in a poem about women at the DMV,
scrutinizing every line
to find political and technical correctness;

I would buy her a drink however,
if I thought there wouldn’t be a test
afterwards.

It is rather amusing though
to find out
that there really are people out there
attempting to learn how to write this bullshit,
it makes me wonder
if it’s poetry they’re trying to master;

or life,

because I never saw any difference
between the two.
.
.