Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Ready


I search for answers and truth
among the shadows and fringes,
I travel through this land
of dying dreams and false hopes,
and no matter where I turn
it always comes back to You;
You are every answer,
You are every truth,
You are all I need.

When nothing seems right,
when the light no longer shines
and the whole world
comes crashing in,
You are there
like a cool springtime breeze,
when no one hears,
when no one cares,
You stand by my side
closer than a brother;
the King who laid down His life
for a wretched piece of filth
like me.

In this life I have become a joke,
a fool without hope,
a lost ship tossing and turning
upon the raging ocean waves,
look inside and see so much more;
see the sincerity,
see the passion,
see the desire,
see the love.

Make my life fruitful,
make me a well from which
living waters flow,
make me a son in whom a father
may take pride.

I am ready Lord,
ready to do Your will,
ready to belong to You,
ready to come home to You.
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My Eyes Do Not See


That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.
                                                                                                II Corinthians 12:10

My eyes do not see,
but I have eyes
with which to see,
my ears do not hear,
but I have ears
with which to hear,
my mind does not understand,
but I have a mind
with which to understand;
I have You
and that is all I need.

This fleshly body
slowly crumbles into the dust,
yet I continue to rise,
man-made ideas and thoughts
come and go,
but in the end
they mean nothing at all;
I have You
and that is all I need.

Through weakness
Your strength is made perfect,
therefore I shall glory
in all my weakness,
for when I am weak
I am made strong
by Your grace alone;
I have You
and that is all I need.
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Memories


So many memories,
so much lost
along the way,
we try to hang on,
we hold on
with everything we have,
but in the end
they fade away,
like morning mist
before the
noon day sun,
and all that is left
are echoes,
silently bouncing
off empty
forgotten walls.
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Knowledge of God


O the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments, and his ways past finding out! For who hath known the mind of the Lord? Or who hath been his counselor? Or who hath first given to him, and it shall be recompensed unto him again? For of him, and through him, and to him, are all things: to whom be glory for ever. Amen.      Romans 11:33-36

Wandering alone,
destroyed by the moment,
overcome by the magnitude,
afraid of the consequences;
eternally gone.

I have fallen short,
I have been less,
I have not been
all that You created
me to be.

I don’t comprehend the reason,
I can’t explain the why,
I only know through You
it will all work out
in the end.

Without suffering and pain
there would be no relief,
without sadness and sorrow
there would be no happiness and joy,
without darkness and evil
there would be no light and righteousness;
and without You
there would be no hope.

Thank you Lord,
rebuke me when I am wrong,
discipline me as a beloved son,
praise Your holy name forever,
to You belongs the glory;
to You shall I belong
forever.

Common Ground

Once there was a chance
for you and I,
a chance that we could meet
on common ground,
perhaps find a small bit
of mutual understanding,
a place not too much me
and not too much you,
a place somewhere
in the middle,
but now that chance
is long gone,
time has grown short,
you are where you are
and I am where I am
with too much space
in-between,
still we had some moments,
playing catch in the backyard,
fishing in Canada;
you were my dad
and I was your little boy.

I sometimes wish it could
have been different,
somehow better,
something more,
but it was good enough,

thank you dad.
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Saturday, May 26, 2012

Delusion


For the secret power of lawlessness is already at work; but the one who now holds it back will continue to do so till he is taken out of the way. And then the lawless one will be revealed, whom the Lord Jesus will overthrow with the breath of his mouth and destroy by the splendor of his coming. The coming of the lawless one will be in accordance with the work of Satan displayed in all kinds of counterfeit miracles, signs and wonders, and in every sort of evil that deceives those who are perishing. They perish because they refused to love the truth and be saved. For this reason God sends them a powerful delusion so that they will believe the lie and so that all will be condemned who have not believed the truth but have delighted in wickedness.
II Thessalonians 2:7-12
Therefore in one day her plagues will overtake her; death, mourning and famine. She will be consumed by fire, for mighty is the Lord God who judges her. Revelation 18:8
The joy does end,
here in this land
of limited sun,
cold hearted and alone,
forsaken and forgotten,
the gate is closing,
the gap is narrowing,
the light is starting to
disappear,
there are things bigger
than life,
bigger than death;
bigger than dreams.
Even now they mock,
twisting the truth,
creating monuments of self-glory,
worshiping idols of their own doing,
maligning anyone and everything,
laughing at the misery and suffering,
exploiting the helpless and weak,
drowning in self-proclaimed wisdom,
unable to understand truth,
incapable of anything more
than what they are,
refusing to see past themselves,
seeking life, liberty and the pursuit
of perpetual pleasure,
blinded by their superiority,
wallowing in the fantasy,
delighting in the delusion;
finding comfort in the lie.
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Monday, May 21, 2012

Buddy


I look at you now,
I see the years passing before my eyes,
I feel the changes taking place;
only yesterday you were the little boy
eating McDonalds hotcakes and sausage,
watching spongebob and rugrats,
screaming “yeckkk!!!”
then throwing the worms into the lake
the first time I took you fishing.

Now you stand on the edge of manhood,
no longer the wide-eyed little boy
holding my hand on the boardwalk,
begging “please Pa!, please Pa!”
at every miniature golf or arcade passed,
a tiny bundle of energy,
never slowing down;
exasperating yet so endearing
at the same time.

I remember towing you around the pool by my beard,
both of us laughing so hard I thought my side would burst,
playing whiffle ball for hours on end,
never ready to quit,
always ready for a new adventure
whenever I could find the time;
of which there never seemed to be enough.

Now you hit baseballs over fences,
with a busy schedule and little time,
which is the way it should be,
as natural as the setting sun,
but no matter where you go,
or what this life has in store for you,
always remember one thing;
I love you buddy,
more than you can ever know.
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Sunday, May 20, 2012

Dogshit and Other Saturday Morning Rituals




In the morning we awake to
dog shit on the kitchen floor,
Cody our family dog is getting old,
he can no longer control his bowels,
this is not the first time,
“That dog has got to go!!” cries my wife;

I suppose she’ll want to get rid of me too
when I start shitting on the kitchen floor.

Upstairs my grandson
watches Saturday morning cartoons,
Hercules or some other super hero, I think,
when it is over he and I will go to McDonalds
for out ritual hotcakes and sausage,
he usually eats all the sausage and
about a quarter of the hotcakes,
I eat the rest.
I think that is my role in life now,
to finish eating what he cannot,
someday he will grow up and eat
everything on his plate;

I suppose I will starve to death then.

Elsewhere my 15 year old
comes bursting through the kitchen door,
fresh from spending the night
at her best friend’s house,
“Watch the dog shit!” I cry out,
“Ooooooh! Gross!” she replies,
then bounds up the stairs to her room
where she will sleep most of the day
after being up all night
talking to boys on the phone;

she thinks I don’t know about these things.

Meanwhile I get out the paper towels and lysol
to clean up Cody’s shit,
who looks at me with deeply apologetic eyes,
“It’s ok” I tell him;

“we’re all getting old.”
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Pain in the Ass




My 4 year old grandson
is a little pain in the ass,
always looking for new ways
to get in trouble,
always wanting to do
exactly what you don’t want him to do.

He spent a week and a half with us
down at the shore,
the day his mom took him home
I bought him a Franklin doll
and a bag of candy,
he tore the hat off Franklin,
and when I tried to hug him goodbye
he hit me in the mouth with the bag of candy;


now it’s real peaceful and quiet;



I sure do miss that little pain in the ass.
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Monday, May 14, 2012

Hope?



“Life is a tale told by an idiot – full of sound and fury, signifying nothing” – William Shakespeare.


What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun.    Ecclesiastes 1:9

“See that I am He! There is no god besides me. I put to death and I bring to life, I have wounded and I will heal, and no one can deliver out of my hand."    Deuteronomy 32:39

We live, we die,
we laugh, we cry;
there is nothing new under the sun.

All the accomplishments of man,
all the clever, flowing words,
are but meaningless dust,
vanities and vexations,
twisting and blowing,
scattering on the shifting wind,
dark mists of evaporating vapor,
clanging gongs of raucous sound,
deep reservoirs of hopeless hope,
obstinate children full of excess
and self-glorification,
pompous celebrations of mediocrity
and drivel,
early morning shadows,
disappearing with the
noon day sun;
here today,
gone tomorrow;
they are nothing,
nothing at all;
not one can bring
life from death;
not one can escape
from the grave.

Without You there is no meaning,
without You there is no truth,
without You there is no light;
without You there is no life.
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Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Some Days


Dark days without sun,
some days you remember,
some days you don’t,
traveling down moonless roads
in the middle of this forever
winding night,
desperately seeking a
continuously changing destination,
even now you feel the sting,
even now you know the
hopelessness;
does this sadness never end?

Somewhere on the journey,
you fell in love with the pain,
looking forward to the next
big heartache,
silently wishing for the loneliness,
secretly reveling in the emptiness,
taking comfort in the isolation,
finding solace in nothing and
no one.

Inside there is a great vastness,
an untapped well of darkness,
stretching beyond the horizon,
more than the untrained eye
can imagine,
more than can be described with
words alone,
it is upon these shores
that you drift;
it is the only place
you have ever called home.

Outside they await,
screaming for just a little more,
waiting for the finale,
thirsting for the ultimate thrill,
the final curtain,
the last call,
and you know that somehow
you will deliver the goods;

know matter what the cost.
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