Everything

Parole

Within the conquering depths

of this cold black cell,

You bring hope and life;

from the empty solitude

of this perpetual dungeon,

You fill me with your light;

trapped in the endless despair

of this eternal bondage,

You bring freedom and peace;

this prison,

holding me captive all my life,

no longer decides

who or what I shall be,

this depraved fortress of iniquity,

filled with unending suffering and pain,

where so much has been lost,

no longer shackles me

in the binding chains of anger and fear,

the master of eternal night,

whose darkness and lies

deceive the whole world,

no longer blinds my eyes;

freed from this prison

at a cost beyond compare,

paroled by Your sacrifice and love

through Your amazing mercy and grace;

PRAISE YOUR NAME FOREVER!!!

Deliver Me

Within nighttime dreams,

I walk in cold, forsaken places,

dark, dead lost places;

far beyond the reach of hope.

I listen to the suffering,

I hear the sorrow,

I feel the pain,

I know the emptiness;

they are places through which

I have walked before.

When I awake

You are there,

standing by my side,

never letting go,

never walking away,

renewing and healing me,

blessing me when I deserve nothing,

forgiving me

when I cannot forgive myself,

reminding me that without You

I can never overcome.

Deliver me O Lord

from dark, dead places,

lost and forgotten places,

hidden within the shadows of dreams;

take away the emptiness

as only You can.

Hold me now,

bathe me in Your light,

fill me with Your love,

surround me with Your glory,

let me belong to You forever,

my Savior,

my King,

my God,

my Everything.

Mediocrity

I am tired of mediocrity,

I am tired of compromise and second best,

I am tired of almost and maybe,

I am tired of what could have been

or what should have been,

I am tired of half truths and inventions of the mind;

I am tired of the religions of men.

I want truth,

I want reality,

I want depth,

I want freedom,

I want light,

I want the living Jesus,

I want the living God,

I want the Comforter

who speaks of all truth,

who fills with power and fire;

lead me by Your word O Lord,

let me glorify Your precious name,

show me Your will my God,

that I might live in it forever,

free me from this prison of darkness and lies,

renew that which was lost so long ago,

restore the light of Your glorious presence,

let me sit in Your shadow,

be my King forever,

remove anything not of You O Lord,

fill me O Lord,

show me O Lord,

guide me O Lord,

let me walk in Your will,

let me be a son in whom

You may take pride;

serving You is my purpose,

living for You is all I need.

Do Not Fear

Alone in the shadows,

lost with no way home,

frightened and confused,

heading for destinations unknown;

do not worry,

do not fear;

God is near.

In the darkness,

in the light,

within the sorrow,

within the joy,

through the suffering,

through the pain,

through times both good and bad;

do not worry,

do not fear;

God is near.

All things pass,

all things fade,

but His mercy endures forever,

His love knows no bounds,

so rest your tired head

my troubled and frightened child;

do not worry,

do not fear;

God is near.

Worthy

Speak and I shall listen,

lead and I shall follow,

for You are my God

and I am Your servant,

for this purpose was I born,

for this reason do I live.

Above You there is no other,

You alone are worthy,

You alone deserve all worship and praise,

within You do all things lie,

within You are all things possible.

Washed with the blood sacrificed for so many,

You fill us with your spirit

that we might find true understanding,

that we might know

true knowledge and peace.

A gift so precious

it surpasses all understanding,

given freely to all who accept,

though none deserve.

Oh my Lord,

my spirit cries out for You,

speaking the love and adoration

that is Yours and Yours alone,

let the glory of Your mystery consume me

like a great and wonderful fire,

teach me,

guide me,

admonish me,

cleanse me,

purify me,

heal me,

sanctify me;

that through faith alone,

I might be found worthy

of one such as You.

Siege

Outside this worn and battered fortress

the enemy patiently waits,

laying siege to these crumbling walls,

setting hidden traps and snares,

offering enticing lures and baits,

silently probing and testing,

continuously searching for

weakness and flaws;

preparing for the final assault.

Within the darkness

I seek Your face,

through the long lost night

I wait for Your presence.

Rise up O mighty Lord,

defend me from unknown enemies,

free me from unseen prison bars,

fill me with Your holy fire,

bathe me in Your glorious light,

overwhelm me with Your holy spirit.

You are all that I desire,

You are all that I need;

You are the center of my hope,

You are the answer to every question;

You are all there is.

In You shall I find relief,

through You shall I overcome,

in You shall I have victory,

through You shall I be delivered.

Stay with me forever,

strengthen my weakening defenses,

prepare my heart for the coming battle,

let me be triumphant in the face of defeat;

bring me home to You.

Forever

When you are troubled,

turn to Him

and He will be there,

when you are despaired,

call out His name

and He will hear;

this world,

this life,

this time,

this moment,

all pass away;

but His love is forever.

For He will never forsake us,

never leave us,

this is His word,

this is His holy promise,

to all who believe,

to all who trust,

on His wonderful

and precious name.

The True Vine

“I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”              John 15:1-5

You are the true vine

I am the branch,

apart from You

I am nothing,

within You

I become fruitful;

within You

I am a son of the living God.

Your light is greater

than words can express,

Your love fills

even the deepest valley,

Your words speak truth

far beyond what my limited mind

can comprehend;

hold on to me

forever.

Yeshua

What words have I,

that pay honor to a King?

What gift can be given,

worthy of His name?

He who overcame,

He who defeated death forever,

He who reigns eternally,

He who is our master.

Mocked and mistreated,

spit upon and reviled,

beaten and scourged,

led like a lamb to the slaughter,

sacrificed upon a tree

for our iniquities and transgressions,

resurrected from the grave

that through faith in Him

none should perish,

but all might have life.

Through Him are all things possible,

through Him are all things made new,

to Him does all praise belong,

to Him is all glory given,

lift up His name

before all others;

Yeshua,

the Holy One of God.

In the Morning

In the morning when I awake,

You are there,

flooding my soul with hope,

removing the internal darkness,

bringing comfort and relief,

renewing my strength,

providing the joy and peace

I so desperately need.

Being where You are

is all I ask,

standing at the foot of Your throne

is all I desire,

for You shall provide

everything I need,

You shall wipe away

every tear.

What words can describe

Your mighty glory?

What thoughts can compare

with Your magnificent truth?

You who made the heavens,

You who command the seas,

You who control the winds,

You who know the hearts

of every man.

I fall down in humility and awe

at the feet of Your wondrous presence;

let every breath

be breathed for You,

let every lip

praise Your holy name.

O mighty Lord,

let me worship You

forever.

Through You

I come before You O Lord,

broken and corrupt,

a lowly lump of clay

ready to be shaped

by Your blessed and holy hand.

Teach me Your ways

that I may walk in them forever,

show me Your truth

that it might be engraved in my soul,

immerse me in Your love and grace

that I might find life more abundant,

shine Your light before my eyes

that they may be blind no more.

Through You are all things made new,

through You are all things possible,

through You do we find strength,

through You do we have hope.

All I Ever Need

Change my heart O Lord,

remove the darkness lurking within,

take away the lonely emptiness,

save me as only You can.

I know the inadequacies,

I feel the uncertainty and doubt,

I try to hide the incompetence,

I hear the rage scream and shout.

Inside I am as dry bones,

my voice broken and unheard,

my skin burns with unquenchable fire,

my spirit longs for Your Holy word.

Open my eyes O Lord,

reach out Your mighty hand,

remove the temptations of this flesh,

help my carnal mind understand.

Allow me to overcome

all which keeps us apart,

deliver me from evil,

purify my wounded heart.

Heal my broken soul,

cleanse my every thought,

sanctify every motive,

by Your precious blood have I been bought.

Fill me with Your love,

walk with me for all my days,

teach me Your discipline

show me Your righteous ways.

You are where I want to be,

Yours is the voice I long to hear,

Your love is all I need,

with You I will not worry or fear.

Without You I am nothing,

with You I have all I will ever need,

You are my Savior and King,

through You I have been forever freed.

Lead Me O Lord

Lead me O Lord,

by ways I have not known,

guide me along unfamiliar paths,

turn the darkness into light,

make smooth the rough and rocky places.

I turn to You in sorrow and humility,

contrition and repentance cloud my troubled spirit,

forgive the iniquities and transgressions,

remove the darkness inside my soul,

fill me with the hope of Your presence,

restore the joy of knowing You.

All things are possible

for You mighty Lord,

no task too difficult,

no request too great,

no mountain too high.

You who created all that is known,

You who command the wind and sea,

You who were the first,

You who are the last,

in You shall I place my trust,

in You shall I find peace;

be my Savior!

be my King!

let me be Your servant

forever.

Romans 12:21

Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.                                                    Ephesians 6:11-12 (NIV)

In the depths of my carnal mind

the master of darkness softly speaks,

quietly searching for weakness and flaws,

silently planting his evil seeds;

seeds of lust and temptation,

seeds of doubt and fear,

seeds of hatred and anger,

seeds of revenge and retribution;

corrupting and twisting the truth,

clouding all that is real,

tearing down and destroying

until there is nothing left within,

building walls and divisions

between my brother and I,

putting words of venomous hate

on the tip of my imperfect tongue,

attempting to devastate and waste

all that is good,

all that is pure,

all that is holy and righteous;

all that is from God.

You patiently discipline and rebuke,

until at last I am able to understand;

providing the light for my blinded eyes

while gently holding my trembling hand;

guiding my feeble and wavering steps

as I slowly learn to stand.

Raise me up above the filth and mire,

hold me in Your mighty arms,

remove the darkness surrounding my soul;

teach me to not be overcome by evil

but to overcome evil with good.

Jeremiah 17:14

I have traveled so far,

still I return

to this place where I once began,

this land of degradation and pain

where darkness and silence live hand in hand;

I have traveled so far,

yet have I gone nowhere?

Deliver me O LORD,

do not give me more

than my broken spirit can bear,

do not leave me here

to face the enemy

I could never overcome alone.

In You will I place my trust,

in You will I seek my hope,

in You will I find my salvation,

in You will I enter my rest.

Touch me that I might be healed,

test me that I may be confirmed,

turn me from paths that do not lead to You,

teach me how to walk in Your light.

For if You heal me O LORD,

I will be healed;

if You save me,

I will be saved;

for you are the One I praise.

Down the Road Where You Lead

Amidst the lost and lonely emptiness

of this long cold night,

I search for Your wonderful presence;

throughout the constant bombardment and battering

of the enemies cruel and vicious attacks,

I cry out for You.

O Lord,

be real within my mind and heart,

do not be distant and far away;

reach out Your mighty hand,

bring forth Your glorious mercy and grace,

show Your servant blessed favor.

Silence the careless words of anger and hurt

rolling off my venomous tongue;

remove the thoughts of evil and lust

clouding my flesh-driven mind;

pull me from this iniquity and filth

I find myself drowning in.

I can’t make it any other way,

I have tried so many times before;

I have searched for so very long,

I have walked in darkness all my life.

You are the only answer,

You are the only truth,

You are the only light,

You are the only way.

Save me Lord,

heal my broken spirit,

shelter me from the gathering storm,

guide my every step,

fill me with Your perfect love,

teach me Your righteous and holy ways;

remove anything not of You.

Down the road where You lead

I will travel;

Yours is the face I will seek

for all of my days.

Rejoice

Rejoice in the Lord always.  I will say it again: Rejoice!  Let your gentleness be evident to all.  The Lord is near.  Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.  Philippians 4: 4-7

The cold black night quietly closes in,

the pain steadily intensifies,

blinding and overwhelming,

becoming more than I think

my spirit can possibly bear,

hope slowly fades,

rage fills my mind and heart,

bitterness and anger grow,

until it feels as though

I am about to burst;

the enemy silently waits,

ready for the final kill.

Then You reach out

across the long lonely miles,

using unsuspecting and unexpected messengers,

gently reminding me that You are near,

softly speaking words of encouragement,

renewing my faltering spirit,

providing new found courage,

making it possible to rise once again.

The pain begins to dissolve,

the darkness turns to light,

hope comes flooding in like a mighty river,

Your blessed peace surrounds me

like a well worn blanket,

the enemy retreats

back into the blackness

from which he came.

Once more You have delivered me

from unseen traps and snares,

once more You have brought hope

where there was none to be found,

once more You have saved me

through Your never ending mercy and grace,

I will rejoice in You,

I will declare Your wondrous love,

I will praise Your holy name,

forever.

In the Early Morning Silence

In the early morning silence

You quietly arrive,

washing over me like a warm ocean wave,

humbling my haughty spirit,

cleansing my filth ridden soul,

removing the darkness and dread,

renewing the faltering strength,

letting me know that I am Yours,

and You are mine,

forever.

Praise Your precious name,

never leave me alone,

stay with me throughout the cold, black night,

save me from the darkness waiting outside,

protect me from unseen traps and snares,

for I am just the branch

and You are the vine,

You are the one who provides life,

You are the perfect prize

waiting at the end

of this long and winding road,

without You I am so lost,

without You I can do nothing;

with You all things are possible,

with You I can do all things.

Fill me with Your Holy Fire,

descend upon my head

like a powerful rushing wind,

let me shine

like a great and wondrous light

burning for all the world to see,

guide my faltering feet,

lead me where You would have me go,

use me for Your righteous will,

remake me in Your beautiful and holy image;

bring me home to You.

Just Believe

Ignoring what they said, Jesus told the synagogue ruler “Don’t be afraid; just believe.” Mark 5:36

In the middle of the night

I awake,

gripped with fear,

overcome by the immensity,

afraid of the unknown road ahead,

thinking of all the possible dangers,

unable to control even the smallest detail,

completely inadequate and out of control,

heading on a collision course with disaster,

then I remember the places from where I have come,

all the doors that have been opened,

all the chains which have been removed,

the love and grace that has brought me to this place,

and I hear His soft, cool voice,

gently whispering in the nighttime darkness:

“Don’t be afraid, just believe.”

the fear fades away,

the doubt dissolves into nothing,

the darkness turns to light,

there is only love,

there is only Him;

and that is all that matters.

In the deepest depths,

on the highest heights,

He is there

guiding my path,

showing the way,

the Friend who stands by my side

closer than a brother,

the King who laid down His life

that I might live;

the One who I will love

forever.

The Time Draws Near

Lost in the darkness,

I lie awake

tossing and turning,

frightened and confused,

unsure of the thoughts and emotions,

unable to understand or comprehend

as this dying body of flesh

slowly grows weary and fails,

betrayed by the instincts and hungers

it requires for survival,

destroyed by the intoxicating poisons

it so desperately craves.

The time draws near,

the day is at hand,

soon the morning sun will dawn,

all things shall be revealed.

The light of Your glorious presence

grows brighter,

the power of Your touch

strengthens and renews,

everything changes,

everything fades;

You are all I need,

You are all there is.

Lead me through this wilderness,

let Your righteousness be my guide,

let Your glory shine for all to see,

let Your holy will be done.

Allow me to serve You all my days,

for in You I shall find my deliverance,

in You I shall rise from the dark,

through You I shall overcome;

You who are my Lord,

You who are my King,

You who are my Everything.

He is There

The time draws near,

the journey almost at an end,

home is just beyond the distant horizon,

lying only a heartbeat away;

and I am ready.

He is there waiting,

ready to make all things new,

removing the darkness,

wiping away every tear.

The pain will pass,

the doubt will be removed,

the suffering will be no more,

the night will be turned to day;

the joy shall be forever.

And He is there waiting,

ready to make all things new,

removing the darkness,

wiping away every tear.

The words fade away,

time passes like a dream in the night,

these prison walls crumble into the dust,

all things will be as intended;

all things will be made right.

He is there waiting,

ready to make all things new,

removing the darkness,

wiping away every tear.

All the Days of my Life

Purify me O Lord,

like gold in the refining furnace;

remove the iniquities and impurities,

make me shine like a jewel

standing in the morning sun,

fill me with Your precious fire,

let me reflect the glorious light

that comes from You,

help me to overcome

this body of flesh

so desperately trying to drag me back

into the filth and perversion

of the dark and lonely prison

You have freed me from;

praise Your magnificent mercy and grace.

Give me victory

over the enemy who would destroy

all that is perfect and pure,

save me from the illusions and lies

that blind and deceive,

prepare me for the coming battle;

bring me home to You.

Teach me O Lord,

Your holy and righteous ways,

lead me down mysterious paths,

mold the desires of my heart,

guide me into the center of Your will,

be my Master and my King,

let me serve You faithfully;

for all the days of my life.

Every Tear (Revelations 7:17)

Imagine if you can,

a world where everything

is as it should be,

as it was meant to be;

no darkness,

no evil,

no fear,

no doubt,

no suffering or pain,

no greed or lust,

no jealousy or envy,

no sadness or anger;

only love.

It’s easy to speak about,

much harder to truly see,

in a world ruled by flesh and lust,

where everything is about satisfying fleshly desires,

and self-indulgence and carnal pleasure dominate,

with fear controlling every thought and action,

trying to imagine such a world

is almost beyond normal human comprehension;

but try anyway.

This is the world which was in the beginning,

the world which shall be restored,

the kingdom that is to come,

where the One who lived the only perfect life

will sit on His throne and rule with justice,

protecting all who believe in, and belong to Him.

Where hunger and thirst will no longer exist,

where the sun shall not beat nor heat scorch,

where the Lamb shall be their shepherd,

leading them to springs of living water;

where every tear shall be wiped away

forever.

My Everything

Help me to stand O Lord,

at the foot of Your glorious throne;

lead me down paths of righteousness,

teach me Your sacred and holy ways,

shelter me from the enemy silently waiting outside,

raise me up above the chaos and confusion.

Remove this anger and turmoil

living deep within my troubled soul,

defeat the lusts and perversions

quietly lurking inside my weakened flesh,

deliver me from the evil surrounding my every side;

let me take refuge in You O Lord.

Silence the iniquity and filth

spewing from my foolish tongue;

let every word from my lips

bring praise to Your precious name;

let Your mercy and grace flow like a mighty river;

fill me with Your unspeakable love.

Use this humble vessel,

to declare Your marvelous splendor;

let Your magnificent light shine

like a beacon upon a hill.

When the alluring nighttime darkness,

provocatively beckons my searching soul,

You are there softly calling out,

showing me the way home,

leading me back into Your waiting arms.

Without You all the words are dead,

without You there is no light,

without You there is no tomorrow,

without You there is no hope.

You are my Truth,

You are my Breath,

You are my Life,

You are my Everything.

Just the Same

I would like to imagine,

knowing all that I know now,

that when they came to take my Lord

in that dark and lonely garden

so many years ago,

I would have stood by His side,

demanding that the same fate which awaited Him,

should befall me also,

going with Him hand in hand

to be tortured and die on the cross,

knowing when it was all over

He would take me home,

that the apostles only fled

because they were frightened and confused,

but if they had truly known the miracle that was too come

they would have stood fast,

instead of fleeing like cowards

into the night.

I would like to imagine this,

but inside I know it would not have been so,

that in the end

I would have been just as afraid as they,

that I would have ran just as fast and far as they,

I know it every time I have a chance to profess my faith,

and remain silent,

or when I look the other way

when His precious name is used in vain,

not saying a word

for fear they will turn on me,

just like Peter did;

three times before the cock crowed.

Then I think about the fact

that He knew this would happen,

before it even happened,

that He knew he would be betrayed and left alone

to bear the iniquities of the whole world,

and still He loved us;

just the same.

Thank You

Thank you my precious Lord;

for the blowing wind,

for the swaying trees,

for the nighttime moon,

for the morning sun,

for this precious gift of life;

for every breath.

Thank you for Your word,

for Your mercy and grace,

for the gift of Your Holy Spirit,

for the sacrifice

of Your only begotten Son.

Thank you for Your truth and light

amidst the darkness and lies,

for Your precious love

when there is no love to be found.

Thank you for this peace

You have placed in my heart,

for restoring all that was lost,

for allowing me to be

a son of the Living God.

Let every voice sing praise unto You,

let every knee bow down

before Your glorious presence;

praise Your magnificent creation,

praise Your mighty name,

praise You forever and ever.

Any Less

It’s easy to love Jesus

when you drive a brand new F-350 diesel,

while vacationing for the winter in Gulf Shores, Alabama

in your 100 thousand dollar RV,

taking charter bus trips to Biloxi

for a night at the casinos.

Easy when you live in middle-class America,

surrounded by all your healthy, happy children

and plump, giggling grandchildren,

with your body free from pain,

not twisted and grotesque

by diseases like aids and cancer,

not panting and short of breath

from clogged arteries to the heart,

because you have health insurance and can afford

the best medical treatment available,

with all the specialists and bypass surgeries money can buy,

yes, it is easy then.

Not so easy,

when you go through life worried and afraid,

worried about feeding your children,

worried about providing a shelter over their heads,

worried about the lump growing on your child’s arm,

unable to get it tested,

because you have no health insurance,

praying for the strength to get through one more day,

as you go to your low paying job

where America’s elite treat you like a hired servant,

because they have money and drive diesel powered F-350s,

with ‘I Love Jesus’ on the front license plate

and you don’t.

Some day we will all be the same,

standing before a holy and righteous God,

and I wonder how they will answer then,

when they see themselves

speaking with derision and disgust

to the person working for minimum wage,

because their cheese was sliced

a millimeter thicker than requested,

or because they had to wait

more than 5 minutes in the checkout line,

I wonder who will be blessed then,

I wonder if their diesel powered F-350s

with the ‘I Love Jesus’ front license plates

will mean anything then.

Then He speaks to me;

reminding me

that He walked this earth with nothing,

in spite of being the King

to whom everything belongs,

that He endured humiliation and torment

without ever once complaining or hating,

that even though He was the greatest,

He became the servant of many,

laying down his life for all,

paying a cost only He could pay,

doing the will of the Father

despite the suffering and pain,

giving us the example to be followed,

proving that He loves us all

unconditionally and without favor,

even those who drive brand new F-350s

with ‘I Love Jesus’ front license plates.

And He asks me;

“Is the servant greater than the master?”

as I quietly (and humbly) think to myself;

should I do any less?

Hold On to Tomorrow

All our lives we wait for better days,

sitting at kitchen tables in the middle of the night,

listening to the voices speaking inside our silent heads,

waiting for a morning sunrise just over the horizon.

I have seen your darkness,

I have felt your fear,

I have known your emptiness,

I have been where you are.

I look into the night,

I run from the past,

I search for the answers,

I hear the distant call.

Forever trapped

by man-made ideas and thoughts,

continually caught

within self-made visions and illusions.

Brave new paths lie ahead,

reach for the shining light,

hold on to tomorrow,

don’t give up the fight.

The prize awaits,

the fog does slowly fade,

nighttime darkness crawls away,

dreams no longer hide.

Somewhere just past midnight

detour signs appear,

as a different road beckons,

a new way revealed.

A road which never ends,

a road to call our own,

a road stretching into the future,

a road that takes us home,

where we can lay our

tired, battered heads;

hold on to tomorrow,

don’t give up the fight.

300 Miles Away (Please Wake Up America)

Up in Knoxville the Vols are taking the field,

down in Tuscaloosa the Tide begins to roll,

out in Gatlinburg they’re packin em in

for a big Dollywood weekend,

while 300 miles away people die.

All across the nation plans get underway,

for backyard barbecues and family trips to the beach,

as supermarket shelves are stacked in anticipation

with more than anybody could possibly eat or drink,

while 300 miles away people die.

Stunned by what they are seeing,

people watch the news and shake their heads,

calling in 50 dollar pledges,

vowing to make a difference,

while 300 miles away people die.

In Washington, in Jackson and in Baton Rouge,

fingers are being pointed as the blame game begins,

all across the nation the great debate rages,

filling the blogs and chat rooms with wisdom and advice

from every self-made expert the internet has to offer,

while 300 miles away people die.

Please wake up America,

we are all to blame,

we are all guilty,

we all watched and waited from afar,

while 300 miles away people died.

More than homes and people have disappeared,

more than dreams are shattered,

more than a way of life is gone,

part of a nation has died with them.

Now is the time to stop the finger pointing and blame,

now is the time to stop worrying about the pursuit of perpetual pleasure,

now is the time to reach out and love one another as never before,

now is the time to trust in the One who can heal all things,

now is the time for repentance;

please wake up America,

before it is too late.

Closer Than a Brother

Search my mind and heart O Lord,

remove the darkness and doubt,

shelter me from the enemy

waiting outside these prison walls,

ready to exploit and abuse

even the slightest weakness.

Help me overcome the anger,

pull me from the turmoil,

defeat the fleshly lusts,

destroy the deadly perversions,

deliver me from the consuming evil,

let me find refuge in You.

Re-create all that I am,

make me in the mirror

of Your holy image,

bathe me in the wonder

of Your magnificent light;

fill me with Your wondrous love.

Nothing is beyond

Your powerful touch,

all things are possible

for You O Lord;

even this.

To You do I surrender,

in You do I trust,

before You do I fall,

into Your hands

do I commend my spirit.

You who are my holy King,

You who are my shining light,

You who guides my every step

through the eternal darkness

of this long black night;

You who stands by my side

closer than a brother.

Everything

O mighty Lord,

help me let go of all I have known,

give me discernment over all that I see,

purge anything that is not of You.

Let me lay down this sinful robe worn from birth,

let me walk in Your shining brilliance,

let me live by the sound of Your wondrous voice,

let Your holy commands be engraved in my heart,

let me be a son in which a father may be proud,

let me be like You O Lord.

Give me courage to withstand the onslaught

when my enemies shamefully use me,

let me bring glory to Your name,

let my lips speak only of Your praise,

let my life be a living testament to You O Lord,

for You alone are worthy.

I long for Your presence,

I delight in Your will,

I live for Your fellowship,

I find my comfort and hope in You.

You are my King,

You are my Truth,

You are my Light,

You are my Way;

You are my Everything.

Raise Me Up

The time has begun,

today shall be the day,

now is the answer,

here in lies the way.

In the morning when I rise,

You are there,

softly speaking to my soul,

humbling my swollen ego,

making me understand

the glory and magnificence

that is Yours alone.

Throughout the day,

as my tongue speaks foolish vanities

and my mind thinks

self-absorbed, hate filled thoughts,

You softly remind me;

gently rebuking,

patiently teaching.

Raise me up O Lord,

help me to stand,

fill me with Your Holy Spirit,

consume me with Your wondrous fire,

surround me with Your marvelous love.

Reach out with Your mighty hand,

cleanse my filthy garments,

heal my damaged soul,

remake me in Your holy image,

remove anything not of You.

O magnificent Lord,

Light of heaven,

King of the universe,

Savior of the world,

let every voice

sing praises unto You,

let every breath taken

glorify Your precious name.

All That I Have

You shine like a beacon in the night,

bringing light to a land grown dark,

restoring life to a dying world,

providing truth where there was none,

so many years

spent living in eternal darkness,

no one knowing,

no one seeing;

but You.

Locked away

like some dirty little secret,

the self-inflicted abuse

slowly taking it’s toll,

until there was nothing left;

nowhere left to turn,

nowhere left to run;

then You called out,

leading me to places

never before seen,

showing me possibilities

never before imagined,

by Your suffering and sacrifice

was I saved,

by Your wounds and stripes

was I healed.

You have restored

all that was lost,

You have brought

new hope and joy

where there was none;

to You do I owe all that I have,

to You will I belong forever.

Holy Words

Caught up in the moment,

lost in the confusion and chaos,

surrounded by a ruthless enemy,

I take shelter in Your protective arms,

within the silence and solitude

of the long black night,

I seek Your righteous counsel.

Guide my path O Lord,

direct my wavering hand,

let all who see my life

know the beauty and wonder

of Your marvelous mercy and grace;

do this for Your glory my Lord,

do this for Your mighty name.

Who am I,

that You should pour out Your blessings?

Who am I,

that You should see my life?

There is a way that seems right to a man,

but in the end it leads to death.

                                    Proverbs 16:25

All my thoughts,

all my knowledge,

all my righteousness,

are but filthy rags

before Your mighty presence.

“For My thoughts are not your thoughts,

neither are your ways My ways,”

declares the Lord.

“As the heavens are higher than the earth,

so are My ways higher than your ways

and My thoughts than your thoughts.”

                                    Isaiah 55:8-9

Thank You my precious Lord,

for Your marvelous, glorious light,

for Your holy words of wisdom and truth

which shine like rare and wondrous pearls.

Just as He Promised

Someday the last line will be written,

there will be no more waiting,

no more searching for the final word,

no more pursuit of the perfect phrase,

nothing more to be saved.

I wonder if there will be closure,

I wonder if I will feel peace,

I wonder if I will have said it all,

I wonder if anyone will take notice,

I wonder if anyone will care.

I suspect in the end,

my words will die and decay away,

just as this fleshly body

will crumble into the dust

from whence it came.

It does not concern me,

for I will be with my Lord then,

He will provide my sustenance,

He shall wipe away my tears,

He will fill me with joy,

He shall be my hope and redeemer,

He will make all things new,

He will provide all that I ever need,

just as He said in His holy word;

just as He promised.

Let All the Earth Sing Praises Unto Him

Great is the Lord our God,

His righteousness and justice stand like a mighty mountain,

His mercy flows like a great and powerful river,

His majesty shines like a rare and beautiful jewel;

let all the earth sing praises unto Him.

For there is no other like Him,

no other who saves His people from their sins,

no other who defends the lonely and lost,

no other who shelters the fatherless and weak;

let all the earth sing praises unto Him.

In the nighttime darkness,

He is there by my side;

in the morning when I awake,

He is there holding my hand;

guiding me,

teaching me,

disciplining me,

loving me,

showing me the paths

down which I should travel,

providing the strength

to hold on just a little while longer;

let all the earth sing praises unto Him.

For He is God almighty,

the holy King of the universe,

the Master of mercy and grace,

the Creator of heaven and earth,

the Beginning and the End;

the Truth,

the Light,

the Way;

Everything;

let all the earth sing praises unto Him.

All Things Are Possible

Out on the front line,

anticipating the approaching dawn,

the hour grows short,

even as the waiting turns long;

everything changes with time,

even this.

White on black,

black on white,

all is not as it seems,

there is more than meets the eye;

some mysteries

were never intended for discovery,

some truth

is more than most can handle,

some lies

are better left untold.

Don’t let me sink

into this sea of darkness and pain,

help me rise above the surface,

let me feel the light once more,

allow me to breathe again,

turn defeat into victory,

guide my escape

from these demonic monsters,

desperately pulling me down,

give me the strength to resist

their unceasing perversion and depravity.

Show the world that with You,

I can do all things,

that He who is within

is greater than he who is without;

that for You

all things are possible.

Great is the Lord Our God!

When I drift off into the darkness of sleep,

You are the last thought on my mind;

when I awake to the light of a brand new day,

You are the first one to enter my rested heart.

Let all my words speak of Your glory,

let every sound issued from my lips

bring praise to Your wonderful name,

let every creature fall down before You,

let every tongue cry out and confess

that You alone are King.

Great is the Lord our God!

Holy is His mighty name,

mercy and righteousness go before Him,

truth and justice light His glorious way.

Great is the Lord our God!

By Him alone were all things created,

by His hand do birds of the air fly,

by His voice do mighty oceans roar,

by His touch does every heart beat.

Great is the Lord our God!

His love is beyond compare,

His faithfulness will never fail,

His words are like precious jewels,

His greatness exceeds mere words.

Great is the Lord our God!

He reaches out His powerful hand

to the lonely and lost,

He brings comfort and joy

to the down trodden and despaired,

He heals the broken hearted,

He lifts up the poor in spirit,

by His marvelous light are His people led

through the darkness of this forsaken wilderness.

Great is the Lord our God!!!

A Son of God

But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become sons of God, even to them that believe on his name: Which were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God                              John 1:12-13

How great is Your wisdom O Lord,

how deep Your knowledge;

Your words are a soothing ointment,

healing the minds and souls of those

seeking Your mercy and grace,

Your justice and truth a mighty mountain

which never bends or breaks.

Fill me with Your spirit,

lead me through the dark and hidden places,

lift me up above the mire and filth,

guide me down paths of righteousness,

show me Your perfect will,

let me be Your servant forever.

In You will I place my trust,

in You will I find my hope,

through You will I seek shelter,

through You shall I overcome.

You are my King,

You are my Master,

You are my Lord,

You are my God,

You are my Everything.

Without You there is no today,

without You there is no tomorrow,

without You there is no beginning,

without You there is no end.

You alone have brought me to this place,

restoring all that was lost,

providing long awaited refuge,

bringing joy where there was none;

You alone have made it possible,

to become a son

of the living God.

Somewhere There is Love/Somewhere There is You

Somewhere there is decency and goodness,

amidst the evil and iniquity;

somewhere there is mercy and hope,

within the suffering and doubt;

somewhere there is love,

somewhere there is You.

Where darkness is no more,

and light shines pure and bright;

where every tear is wiped away,

and fear fades like the disappearing night;

somewhere there is love,

somewhere there is You.

The One who bought my freedom with His life,

the One who is my majestic Savior and King,

the One through whom all things flow,

the One whose praises I will forever sing.

To You do I swear my allegiance,

in You will my life forever belong,

with You does my loyalty lie,

through You will I know no wrong;

Knowing You,

is worth more than all the riches of this world,

to be where You are,

is the greatest gift one could ever receive.

Teach us Your ways,

guide us as beloved children,

pour out Your Holy Spirit on our heads,

bathe us in Your brilliant light,

fill us with Your precious love.

Show the entire world Your magnificent glory,

let all creation praise Your wonderful name,

let every knee bow,

let every tongue confess,

that You and You alone are Lord and King;

somewhere there is love,

somewhere there is You.

Slave

As Jesus was getting into the boat, the man who had been demon-possessed begged to go with him.  Jesus did not let him, but said, “Go home to your family and tell them how much the Lord has done for you, and how he has had mercy on you.”  So the man went away and began to tell in the Decapolis how much Jesus had done for him.  And all the people were amazed.                                           Mark 5:18-20

All my life I have been a slave,

all my life I have been lost,

all my life I have served unseen masters,

all my life I have been a prisoner;

sexual perversions and lust,

spiritual darkness and depravity,

financial debt and personal greed,

unjustified hatred and anger,

self-destructive gluttony,

fantasies and delusions of grandeur,

vanity and self-induced egotism,

malicious slander and vicious lies.

Sacrificially raped,

silently abused and self-tortured,

steadily stripped of all dignity and self-worth,

repeatedly robbed of confidence and truth,

slowly losing any faith or trust,

then You reached out Your mighty hand,

pulling me up from these raging seas,

unlocking the door of this forsaken cell,

delivering me from eternal bondage,

opening my blinded eyes;

no longer a victim,

no longer a slave.

Now I wait for the day

when I will be where You are,

sitting at the foot of Your throne,

basking in Your glory and light,

telling the world of Your mercy and grace,

telling the world what the Lord

has done for me.

Every Hope

There are many kinds of right,

many kinds of wrong,

many elaborate illusions and myths,

all of which seem correct to a man,

all of which fade with time,

like early morning fog,

rapidly disappearing

before the approaching noonday sun.

There is only one right,

there is only one truth,

there is only one way leading to life,

all others lead to destruction and death.

There are no other choices,

no alternate paths,

no other name by which a man might be saved;

in the end there is outer darkness,

or there is You.

That is the truth,

those are the choices,

despite how hard so many

wish to believe otherwise.

You have delivered me from dark prisons

where only sadness and sorrow live,

You have pulled me up

from pits of decadence and decay

where hope does not exist,

You have restored all that was lost

in the blackness of the night so long ago;

there is nothing more that I desire,

nothing more that I need.

You have provided all that I require,

You have fulfilled every dream,

You are my every hope,

You are my everything;

thank you Lord.

Truth

Jesus looked directly at them and asked, “Then what is the meaning of that which is written:  ‘The stone the builders rejected has become the capstone’?  Everyone who falls on that stone will be broken to pieces, but he on whom it falls will be crushed”

                                                                                                            Luke 20:17-18

Truth;

from where does it come?

to where does it go?

It rattles around inside,

bouncing back and forth

like some misguided nuclear missile,

and just when you think you have the answer

you come to the stark, brutal realization;

you’ve only scratched the surface.

Truth;

so seemingly simple

yet so profoundly complex,

separating darkness from light,

bringing dawn to the fading night,

cutting hard and deep

with surgeon-like precision and skill,

providing comfort and mercy

while dispensing perfect judgment and justice.

Truth is absolute,

truth is forever,

truth never changes,

truth never compromises,

truth is condemnation,

truth is salvation

all rolled into one,

Truth is the stone

upon which everyone who falls

will be broken to pieces,

but he on whom it falls

will be crushed;

truth is Jesus Christ.

Now There is You

For most of my life I have tried to create art,

painting pictures with words,

offering different perspectives,

silently observing,

hopelessly searching,

forever wondering,

continually hiding.

But words have never quite described

the voice inside;

there were times when they came very close,

but in the end they faded into nothing,

lying broken and unheard,

forgotten and abandoned,

falling like flakes of crystallized snow

upon endless plains of shifting sand,

melting on contact,

gone without hope.

For most of my life

words have been my only companion,

a refuge of safety and solitude,

a convenient hiding place,

a comfortable illusion,

my sword and shield,

a powerful weapon,

by which my enemies might be destroyed;

without mercy,

without compassion,

without hope.

Now the illusion disappears,

the darkness turns to day,

You are healing the wounds,

You are showing me the way,

now there is more than words,

now there is truth and light,

now there is hope,

now there is You.

The Way of Truth (Matthew 7:13-14)

Lost in this sea of darkness,

sentenced to die

from the day we are born,

guilty as charged,

eternally separated,

forever gone.

The dreams of men

are like birds on the wind,

shifting and rearranging,

living and dying,

here today,

gone tomorrow.

There are many roads in life,

leading to far away, unknown destinations,

creating their own specific brand of justification,

finding their own particular version of truth,

but no matter how many truths we create,

no matter how many different ways

we want to believe;

there is only one truth,

there is only one way,

there is only one road.

It does not bend

to fit our ideas or desires,

it does not go in the direction

we demand it to go,

it is final,

it is absolute;

that is how truth works.

Enter through the narrow gate,

for wide is the gate and broad is the road

that leads to destruction,

and many enter through it,

but small is the gate and narrow the road

that leads to life;

and only a few who find it.

Anonymity

For most of my life

I have endured anonymity,

accepting the mental and emotional abuse,

withstanding the humiliating onslaught,

listening to the voices of the proud and vain,

as they crush and demean the weary and worn,

trampling underfoot the helpless and weak;

without mercy,

without reservation,

without compassion.

For most of my life

I have endured anonymity,

with all its darkness and corruption,

hiding in the shadows,

weeping unknown tears,

asking questions with unanswerable answers,

living a lifeless life,

waiting for a definitive end.

Yes I have endure anonymity,

with all its cruel subtleties

and ironic mysteries,

silently watching and observing,

forever imagining and wondering,

continually seeking and searching;

then there was freedom,

then there was hope,

then there was light;

then there was You.

Great is the Lord,

vast are the lessons of His wisdom,

holy are the paths on which He walks,

righteous are all His ways.

My spirit cries out for Your presence,

my mouth thirsts for Your knowledge,

my eyes long for Your beauty and grace,

my soul searches for Your glory and light.

Once Again (Luke 5:8)

Back in the gutter,

covered with filth and stench,

full of dark angry thoughts,

pointing fingers,

passing unfounded judgment;

once again.

Wrapped up in the cares of this world,

thinking of short term solutions,

lost in the self absorbing pity,

searching for flesh driven answers,

drowning in vanity and pride;

once again.

Go away from me Lord,

I am a sinful man!

Instead You reach out Your mighty hand,

pulling me from the murky quagmire,

softly whispering in my ear:

“Don’t be afraid,”

once again.

O Lord,

I don’t know why You suffered and died

for someone like me,

but I know that You did;

I don’t know how someone like You

could love someone like me,

but I know that You do;

and I don’t know

how someone as perfect as You,

could save someone like me,

from the fate which I so undeniably deserve,

but I know that You will;

thank You my Holy Lord,

praise Your mighty name,

all glory to You,

forever and ever.

Once More

The end draws near,

it speaks from within

just as surely as the wind

blowing through the swaying trees.

The last breath waits,

silently and patiently lingering,

as final as ocean waves

crashing down upon deserted winter shores.

I do not fear it,

I do not seek it,

it is what it is,

it will be what it will be,

part of the final story,

a small piece of who and what I was,

the completion of a journey.

I know it will not be easy

dealing with the anxiety and pain,

I know there will be times

when my patience and tolerance will grow short,

when the anger and fear of the flesh will come out,

but I know it will be harder on those around me,

my wife, my family, what few friends I have,

than it will be on me.

Because I know my Lord and Savior,

the One who was sacrificed for me,

the King who laid down His life that I might live,

will be there the whole time;

I know that He will give me the strength

to endure every trial;

I know that He will be by my side

through every moment of suffering and pain;

I know He will never leave me,

never forsake me,

never stop loving me.

It is in His hands that I place my life,

to Him do I submit all that I have,

in Him do I place my trust,

through Him shall I live once more.

I Know

I know that in the end

You will make everything come out right,

I know that this darkness surrounding me now

will fade with the morning dawn.

I know that You will wipe away every tear,

I know that You will make all things new,

I know that You will heal the damage,

I know that You discipline and teach

only those whom You love,

I know that You will stand by my side

through every trial and test,

I know that You will never give me more

than I can withstand;

I know.

Inside I have always known,

just as I have always known

that You are the truth,

that You are the light,

that You are the way.

I knew it when I lay on that gym floor

so many years ago,

Your soft still voice bringing reassurance

that You would be there

when I stepped onto the football field,

I knew it when I stood at the edge,

staring into the eternal darkness waiting before me,

as You pulled me back into Your precious arms,

before I was forever gone;

I knew it then,

I know it now.

And no matter where this road leads,

I know that I will always love You,

that I will always be Yours,

that You will always be my King,

my Lord,

my Savior;

my Everything.

The Wonder of You

There are secret things,

things so dark and forsaken,

things that only You can see,

things that only You can forgive.

You bring me to the foot of Your throne,

You raise me up by the hand,

You strip away the denial and pretenses,

You remove the impenetrable walls,

You bathe me in Your unspeakable light,

You cleanse the dirt and filth within,

You take away the darkness and pain,

You calm the turmoil and agony,

You heal the sickness and suffering,

You fill me with Your unimaginable glory,

You soothe the raging storm.

Renew my faith,

rekindle my fire,

restore my waning strength;

refresh my tired and worn out soul,

fill me anew with Your Holy Spirit.

You are my King,

You are my Lord,

You are my Master,

You are my God,

You my Truth,

You are my Light,

You are my Way.

Never let me forget,

never let me doubt,

never let me take for granted;

the wonder of You.

Discipline

Seek the Lord while he may be found; call on him while he is near. Let the wicked forsake his way and the evil man his thoughts. Let him turn to the Lord, and he will have mercy on him, and to our God, for he will freely pardon. “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways” declares the Lord, “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.                                                             Isaiah 55:6-9

Once more,

You open my eyes,

once again,

You hold up the mirror

before my wretched and pitiful face,

revealing inner things

I could not see on my own,

showing the conceit

of all my preconceived ideas,

humbling the lofty and haughty spirit

by which I have walked,

crushing the self-righteous throne

upon which I have sat,

deflating the egotistical vanity

living inside.

Proving that You alone

know the hearts of men,

making me understand

that You, and You alone,

have the right to judge,

that there are ways

which seem right to a man,

but in the end lead to death.

Lord forgive my selfish pride,

have mercy upon my wicked ways,

guide my blinded eyes,

lead me down Your holy paths,

use me for Your righteous will,

teach me Your perfect ways,

rebuke my errors and mistakes;

discipline me as a beloved son.

The Best We Can

Everywhere there is anger,

everywhere there is meanness,

everywhere there is ridicule,

everywhere there is despair.

Men no longer search for truth,

men no longer thirst for righteousness,

it has become much too dangerous,

political correctness has become

the brave new frontier;

compromise the name of the game.

The world as we know it is falling down,

with no relief in sight;

answers no longer have meaning,

questions are no longer asked.

I close my eyes

and imagine days gone by,

I close my eyes

and see days too come,

I hold on to the hope

while letting go of the reality,

I search for winding, empty roads

where few have ever traveled,

settling in the end

for safety and comfort,

following paths well taken.

Broken promises and lost paradises

tumble down,

like building block houses

on a child’s playroom floor.

Failure hurts,

fantasies and foolish feelings lost,

forever slipping from your grasp,

always just one reach too far,

always a little more than you can hold.

Time and flesh fade

until finally

words are all that is left,

when in truth

they are all there ever was.

Overcoming the night

is never an easy task,

yet still we try,

the best we can.

Letting go of the dreams

was never part of the plan,

yet still we do,

the best we can.

Somewhere little boys are free

to play the games of men,

while dreaming of days ahead,

without running from the demons

of their past.

I am still here,

quietly waiting,

I will wait as long

as You require;

I will wait forever.

I belong to You,

I always have,

I always will;

You are my Lord,

You are my Master,

You are my God;

You are my Everything.

Every Breath

When we are young

we dream of all that could be,

as we grow old

we come to the bitter realization

of all that we are not,

and what will never be.

It is then dreams die,

It is then that hope fades,

It is then truth is lost.

For everything there is a season,

for everything there is a purpose,

for every push there is a shove,

for every action there is a reaction.

Overwhelm me with Your truth,

fill me with Your light,

let today be the day,

let now be the time.

In You we become something greater,

in You we are made complete,

in You dreams live once more,

in You hope is restored,

in You we shall live forever.

Let every breath taken

be taken for Your glory,

let every word spoken

be spoken of Your majesty,

let every creature under the sun

praise Your name.

Be my King,

be my Lord,

be my Master,

raise this vessel from the dust,

make me a noble instrument

useful for Your holy will,

let me be Your humble servant

for all eternity.

Psalm 103

When I turn to You

light comes pouring in,

darkness slips away,

hope rises within;

I am set free.

You are a sweet summer breeze,

a clear mountain stream,

a warm, gentle touch,

innocence and purity;

truth complete.

As far as the east is from the west

have You removed my transgressions from me,

as a father has compassion on his child

have You had compassion on me.

Through Your unfathomable sacrifice

have I been redeemed from the dead,

by Your mercy and grace

has my soul been restored.

Forever shall I belong to You,

forever shall I sing of Your greatness,

forever shall I praise Your name,

forever shall I love You above all others.

Let Your will be done

on earth as it is in heaven,

remove all that is not of You,

cleanse the filth and iniquity

abiding within this imperfect temple,

make me into a new creation;

fill me with Your love.

You are my strength,

You are my rock,

You are my comfort and joy,

You are my God,

You are my Everything.

Where is Thy Sting? (I Corinthians 15:55)

We live in a world ruled by fear,

it dominates our thoughts,

it determines our decisions,

it decides how we live our lives;

fear of illness and disease,

fear of starvation,

fear of destruction and chaos,

fear of losing loved ones,

fear of losing money or possessions,

fear of being different,

fear of growing old,

fear of being sad and alone,

fear of not being loved,

fear of rejection,

fear of suffering and pain,

fear of the unknown,

fear of living life,

fear of the truth;

spiritual fears so dark and deep

we don’t even like to admit they exist.

We live in a world that thrives on fear,

where many prey on the fears of others,

surviving on their reactions,

commercializing their existence,

capitalizing on the opportunities,

exploiting the weakness.

There is One who has conquered death,

there is One who has overcome fear,

through Him we are free to live again,

through Him we are free to ask:

O death where is thy sting?

O grave where is thy victory?

Arise

In the early morning silence

I search for Your unending truth,

amidst the internal chaos and confusion

I seek Your wonderful presence.

Arise,

make a joyful noise

unto the Lord,

for His goodness and mercy

shall last forever.

Through the darkness

of the cold black night,

I feel Your soft cool touch,

from across the void

of unknown chasms

I hear Your small still voice;

I know no fear,

I know no doubt;

thank you Lord.

Arise,

make a joyful noise

unto the Lord,

for His goodness and mercy

shall last forever.

In Him shall I place my trust,

through Him shall I overcome the night,

by Him shall I be made whole,

within Him does all my hope lie.

Arise,

make a joyful noise

unto the Lord,

for His goodness and mercy

shall last forever.

The Comforter

Sometimes I am so close,

some days I am so sure,

as the words flash across my mind

like lightning in the sky,

here and gone in the blink of an eye,

with no idea what comes next.

Awed by the magnitude and depth,

humbled and amazed

by how far it truly goes,

taken aback by the wisdom

with which it speaks,

the Comforter promised by His word;

He who testifies of the truth,

He who teaches discipline and knowledge,

He who brings all things to remembrance.

The precious gift

from the Lord of love and perfection,

the Master of truth and light,

the Holy King of the universe

to whom I owe all that I have,

to whom I will praise,

to whom I will belong

forever.

Redeemed by the power

of His marvelous love and grace,

freed from the bondage of this world

through His suffering and sacrifice,

saved from eternal darkness

by the shedding of His precious blood.

O my Lord,

my sweet, sweet Lord,

to You do I give

everything that I have to give.

How I love Your beauty and light,

how I long to see Your glorious face,

guide me down the path

which leads me home to You.

For All My Days

Father, see my weakness,

forgive my iniquities,

have mercy on my trespasses;

do not leave me here

to face the fate I so richly deserve;

take pity on me Lord,

I am a sinful man.

Amidst all the chaos and confusion

have I had but one desire,

through all the aimless drifting and wandering

have I loved You;

in You will I trust

for all my days.

You have rolled back the darkness,

You have restored the joy,

You have removed the sorrow and shame,

You have returned the hope.

Let Your light shine through the night,

let Your glory be seen by all,

let Your kingdom rule for eternity,

let Your will be done on earth

as it is in heaven;

let me be Your servant

for all my days.

Time continues to move on,

this earthly body crumbles and fades

back into the dust from whence it came,

the things of this world come and go,

yet Your love endures forever.

Soon the pain and suffering will pass,

soon the fear and doubt will be gone;

soon I shall be with You

for all my days.

Joshua

And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.                           Joshua 24:15

Choose you this day

whom ye shall serve;

the time is drawing near,

lines are being drawn

with no room in between,

be ye on one side or the other;

choose you this day

whom ye shall serve;

you have witnessed the truth,

you have walked in the shadow

of His mighty presence,

you have reaped the harvest

of His blessed mercy;

so choose you this day

whom ye shall serve;

but as for me and my house,

we shall choose to serve the LORD.

Dark Night No More

Dark night no more,

suffering and pain forever gone,

Your precious light shines upon my face,

the road ahead becomes clear,

a new day begins to dawn.

Hold me in Your arms,

pour out Your mercy and grace,

soothe the raging storms,

silence the savage screams,

save me from the fate I so richly deserve;

there is only truth,

there is only peace,

there is only love,

there is only You;

there is nothing more I need.

You have defeated the darkness,

You have conquered the fear,

You have restored the life,

You have returned the hope,

You have raised me from the deep.

Forgive my foolish ways,

remove my haughty pride,

humble my stubborn heart,

show me how to live;

make me like You O Lord.

Be real within my heart,

mold my desires around Your Holy will,

teach me as a father teaches a son,

speak inside my soul,

change my ways.

Shield me with Your love,

walk with me through the shadows,

protect me from the night,

be with me wherever I go.

For all my days

I will trust in You.

I Will

I have rested,

I have slept through the long cruel night,

I have withstood the sting

of twilights last goodbye,

I have seen the land of shadows end,

where nothing ventures

and nothing returns.

Inside we are all the same,

crawling, running, searching, seeking,

so close, yet so incredibly far,

hiding from truth and mysterious creatures

standing just beyond the void,

where words shake out

and sorrows seldom go,

whispering final goodbyes

along the way.

You miss so much

trapped within these prison walls,

where recognition is lost

within subtle rows

of uninterrupted, self-induced bliss.

Sometimes answers to prayers

do not provide expected results,

sometimes the truth

is a hard road to travel;

but even unwelcome answers,

are better than no answers at all.

I do not understand the why,

I do not see the how,

I do not have the desire or the vision,

but if this is from You;

then I will.

I Have Lived a Life/You Were There

I have lived a life,

it has not always been correct,

it has not always been sweet,

it has not always been perfect,

but it has always been mine.

I have lived a life,

what more can be said?

I have made many mistakes,

I have had many regrets,

through it all I have tried,

through it all I did my best.

I have lived a life,

I have gambled and lost,

I have smiled and won,

I have laughed with angels,

I have cried with demons.

I have lived a life,

for better or worse,

for richer or poorer,

through good times and bad,

I have lived a life.

Within every victory,

inside every defeat,

there has been one constant, one truth,

one answer to which I have returned,

time after time.

Whether lying in dark, silent gyms,

waiting to run onto electrified, football fields,

or driving blindly down dark, winding roads,

barely able to hold on to the wheel,

with eyes blinded from alcohol and drugs,

You were there.

When walking alone

through deserted, snow covered streets,

where everything seemed dead and lost,

You were there,

patiently waiting,

silently offering hope,

steadily dispensing love,

constantly providing truth,

gently guiding my path

back to You.

Now I must dig deep,

now I must face the final test,

now I must overcome the last obstacle,

now I must turn to You

for the strength to see it through,

now I must put my trust in You,

within whom all things are possible.

Give me the words,

give me the strength,

give me the power,

give me the answers.

I have lived a life,

I have won,

I have lost,

now through You,

I am ready to live

a better one.

One Flesh

What began so small

has become so great,

what once was two

has been joined as one;

one love,

one life,

one truth,

one flesh.

You are the one

my heart desires,

you are the one

who makes me whole.

when you laugh I laugh,

when you cry I cry,

without you I would be lost,

without you I would be alone,

without you I would be incomplete.

No one but you and I

understand this great and magnificent miracle,

this deep and hidden mystery

that our life has truly been,

a beautiful, wondrous, blessing of God

for which I give continual thanks.

What God has joined together

let no one put asunder,

as it was in the beginning

so shall it be in the end.

Do Not Deny Me You

I have been running,

I have been hiding,

I have been denying,

I have been ignoring,

I have become lukewarm,

I have become complacent,

I have sought paths that are easy;

I have become a friend of the world.

Everything I have belongs to You,

everything I am is because of You;

You hold my life in Your hands,

it is Yours to do as You will,

it is Yours for better or worse;

You are the potter, I am the clay.

Father forgive my weakness and disobedience,

have mercy on my soul,

see into my broken and humble heart,

remove my sinful desires and ways;

as far as the east is from the west.

Pour out my life like a drink offering,

trample this flesh underfoot,

take all that there is to take,

but do not deny me You,

do not remove Your presence from my face,

do not extinguish Your precious light,

do not allow me to slip back into the darkness;

do not deny me You Lord,

do not deny me You.

True Love

Love is a hard word,

easy to say,

difficult to prove,

impossible to overcome.

It is a word I have used many times

without true understanding,

without complete comprehension

of just what it was saying,

a word filled with endless meaning and possibility,

yet so much bigger than my ability to fulfill,

full of such magnificent intent,

but used for all the wrong reasons.

True love overcomes all obstacles,

true love never gives up or quits,

true love goes beyond physical barriers,

true love comes but rarely in the lives of men,

true love comes from God.

“Greater love has no one than this,

that he lay down his life for his friends.”

More than words

by the One who lived them,

more than empty promises

by the One who provided the way.

The One who gave us the perfect example,

the One who made all things possible,

the One who holds the answer,

the One who is truth,

the One who is light;

the One who is love.

The great I AM,

the Lord of all creation,

the holy King of the universe;

the Master of us all.

Where You Are

Depravity is never far away,

like a cancer it grows;

eating everything in its path,

destroying all that is good and true,

mocking righteousness,

laughing at suffering and misery,

hurling damning accusations,

enslaving its victims in decadence,

forever caught in the bondage of sin.

Silence becomes a special friend,

isolation the weapon of choice;

dirty little secrets

impossible to defend,

perversions and lusts

hiding behind flesh covered walls,

truth slowly disappearing,

light gently fading,

years rolling quietly by,

night steadily consuming the day.

The anger rises up,

the fleshly imperfection takes hold,

then I remember You;

I remember Your suffering and sacrifice,

the shame sets in,

the humility overwhelms;

I am so unworthy.

Some days I am so close,

others I am so far;

look down on me now,

hear the murmur of my crying heart,

lift me from this dry, lonesome grave,

have mercy on Your servant,

take me where You are.

Remove the darkness,

unlock the chains,

let the light come pouring in,

fill me with Your love.

I Am So Close

The words come,

the words go,

flowing and spinning

from there to here, and back again,

where too is never known,

where from even less,

like some mad river

gone wildly berserk.

I don’t want emotions,

I don’t want feelings,

I only want Your truth,

I only desire Your reality,

I only live for Your love.

I am so close,

I am so ready,

come to me

forever.

Without You the words are nothing,

without You there is no tomorrow,

without You the sun does not shine,

without You there is no hope.

One life,

can it really make such a difference?

Does anyone really care?

When so many come and go,

when so much begins and ends,

does anyone really care?

So many greater than I,

so much more righteous than I,

love You with a love so pure,

how could You possibly love me?

yet You do.

Look into my heart,

see the hope growing within,

remove the thorns of darkness

choking life before it begins.

Take my hand,

pull me from these waters

swirling about my head,

reach out and heal the damage done,

take away the emptiness

as only You can.

In You will I trust,

despite what my eyes do see,

Yours is the voice to which I will listen

no matter what my ears may hear,

Yours is the face I will seek

for all the days of my life.

To You do I belong,

now and forever more,

in You will I find refuge

from the raging storm outside.

How precious is Your word O Lord;

it is nourishment for my soul,

it is light before my eyes,

it is comfort for the weary,

it is truth in a world

where there is none.

I am so close,

I am so ready,

come to me

forever.

Lead Me Down the Road

Lord have mercy on me,

forgive my wayward ways,

restore my broken spirit,

remove anything not of You.

Rebuke me Lord,

discipline me,

teach me,

love me;

heal me.

You alone are worthy,

You alone are righteous,

You alone are holy,

You alone do I worship;

You alone do I love.

All things are possible for You,

nothing is beyond Your saving grace,

fill me with Your Holy Spirit,

touch me with Your healing hand;

lead me down the road

that brings me home to You.

Vanities and Vexation

I hear the words being said,

I listen to the songs being played,

I watch the drama unfold,

and in them all

are the words of men,

in them all

are vanities and vexation,

I who deserve nothing,

I who have disappointed and fallen short

time after time,

I who have lied and cheated

without reservation or fear,

come before Your throne

with nothing to offer,

seeking forgiveness

through Your mercy and grace.

All my words,

all my thoughts,

all my ideas,

are but vanities and vexation,

imaginations of the heart,

whose time has come and gone,

like the moment in which they live,

fit for nothing but the dust

from whence they came.

O mighty Lord,

lead me by Your light,

guide me by Your voice,

fill me with Your words,

let me live by Your grace alone.

Though I have the praises of all men,

though I have the honor of all the world,

without the joy of pleasing You O Lord,

it would be as nothing.

Your will is all I want,

Your approval is all I need,

it is the desire of my heart,

it is the center of my dream,

it is the glory of my vision.

Settlement

Eventually we are all reduced to settlement,

satisfied with just a little space

where pain and suffering no longer exist,

accepting the consequences

for a moment of solitude,

selling out for pennies on the dollar,

seeking an amicable resolution,

compromising in the name of peace.

No one sees but You,

no one knows but You,

no one hears but You,

no one cares but You.

Lord have mercy on Your servant,

forgive my foul and perverse heart,

renew my downtrodden spirit,

raise me up from this pit,

surround me with Your grace,

glorify Your holy name.

No matter what the circumstances,

I will place my trust in You,

You have restored my broken body,

You have renewed my damaged spirit,

You have shined Your blessed light

upon the dark corners of my soul,

You have freed me from this forsaken prison;

once more.

Thank you Lord,

praise the name of Jesus forever!!!!!

In You

Even if there were no hope of reward,

at the end of this long lonesome road called life,

still would I sing praises unto You,

still would I love Your name;

for Your truth,

for Your light,

for Your sacrifice.

In You there is no darkness,

in You there is no confusion,

in You there is only light,

in You there is only peace,

in You lies all my trust,

in You resides all my hope,

in You I place all my faith,

in You shall I overcome

the darkness of this night,

in You shall I have

life more abundant,

for above You

there is no other,

You alone are worthy.

You know what I need

better than I could ever know myself,

You see that which my limited vision

cannot even imagine,

You lead me to that perfect place

before I even know I have arrived.

You have restored  all that was lost,

You have brought new hope and joy,

to You do I owe all that I have;

to You will I belong forever.

Inside

Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him: but I will maintain mine own ways before him.  He also shall be my salvation: for an hypocrite shall not come before him.

                                                                                                 Job 13:15-16

Inside we are all afraid,

inside we are all searching,

inside we are all alone,

inside we are all defeated;

inside we don’t stand a chance.

I don’t know the whys,

I don’t understand the how,

I cannot comprehend the reasons,

I cannot withstand the crushing blows,

I cannot overcome the darkness;

I cannot see past the night.

I only know that You have,

I only know that You can,

I only know that You will,

I only know that for You

all things are possible,

I only know if I am forced to choose,

then I choose You;

I only know that You

are the one I love.

Lord take me where You are,

remove me from this dark and lonely place,

rebuke and discipline my rebellious ways,

refine me like gold in the refiners fire,

help me fight the battle;

teach me to be like You.

Through every trial and test,

through sorrow and joy,

though You destroy this fleshly vessel,

though You slay me at Your feet,

I will put my trust in You,

for You are my hope and salvation;

Praise Your holy name forever.

The Day is Near

What can be said

that has not been said before?

Facts change,

words rearrange,

details differ,

but at the end of the day

there is nothing new under the sun,

we are still a heartbeat away from forever,

we are still only a mixture

of vanity and vexation.

This life fades like morning dew,

evaporating into the sky,

forever lost,

eternally gone.

All the dreams and fantasies,

all the longing and sadness,

all the hopes and fears,

remain the same,

in spite of toys and technologies,

despite self-imposed dignity,

as we continue to anesthetize and tranquilize

feelings and thoughts,

with pompous litanies of monumental self-worth

and maniacal delusions of grandeur.

Seek that which cannot be lost,

search for truth and light,

find the way

in world without hope,

accept the free gift,

paid for by the only One

who could pay the cost,

He to whom all glory is given,

He who is the King of us all.

I am waiting,

I am ready,

the time is coming,

the day is near.

My Eyes Do Not See

That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.   II Corinthians 12:10

My eyes do not see,

but I have eyes

with which to see,

my ears do not hear,

but I have ears

with which to hear,

my mind does not understand,

but I have a mind

with which to understand;

I have You

and that is all I need.

This fleshly body

slowly crumbles into the dust,

yet I continue to rise,

man-made ideas and thoughts

come and go,

but in the end

they mean nothing at all;

I have You

and that is all I need.

Through weakness

Your strength is made perfect,

therefore I shall glory

in all my weakness,

for when I am weak

I am made strong

by Your grace alone;

I have You

and that is all I need.

Backup

My computer crashed today,

everything I had written

for the last 4 months was lost,

no cd or floppy,

no backup,

it was simply gone

forever.

It’s not like I can recreate it,

this stuff doesn’t work like that,

it comes and it goes,

and when it’s gone

it is gone,

never to return again.

I felt like I had lost a child,

something precious and dear,

but even when you lose a child

eventually you have to move on,

life is like that,

here today,

gone tomorrow;

like a crashed computer.

Moments piled upon moments,

some good, some bad,

some precious,

some unremarkable,

coming and going

with the blink of an eye,

every moment sacred,

every moment uniquely yours.

I prayed to the Lord

and He gave me peace,

He made me remember

what is truly important,

that it’s not the words I write,

not the respect or glory

they might earn,

not about gaining

the admiration of others,

not about feeding my vanity and ego.

He is what is truly important,

He is my King and Lord,

serving Him is where my true joy lies,

glorifying His name

is all that matters.

There will be more words,

there will be other moments

piled upon moments,

like sheets of ice

during a Lake Michigan winter storm,

forming vast mounds of forgotten dreams,

full of dramatic melodramas.

They will fade

like the setting evening sun,

but the Lord shall be forever,

His kingdom will shine for all eternity;

He is my backup,

He is my guarantee.

Doctrine (II Timothy 4:3)

My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay own his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit – fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. This is my command: Love each other.       John 15: 12-17

Entire sanctification or not,

tongues or not,

special discernment,

gifts of the spirit,

self-declared knowledge,

man-made wisdom and

vanities of the heart,

mysterious new doctrines,

emotional roller coaster rides,

puffed up words

that fade with the dust,

one truth,

one Lord,

one kingdom;

in the end

all that will be left

is love.

For now we see with imperfection,

peering through a fog shrouded mist,

unable to find complete clarity or understanding;

one day the fog will roll away,

the doubt will be removed,

we shall see through eyes of perfection;

we shall know perfect truth;

we shall experience perfect love.

Lord I am so unworthy,

I am so inadequate,

go away from me

for I am a sinful man;

tear out my sin-filled eyes,

burn my lips and tongue

with hot burning coals;

let the whole world be silent

before Your magnificent

and holy presence;

let every knee bow,

let every heart confess,

that You and You alone

are Lord and King;

that to You

and You alone

does all glory belong.

Lord let me escape false teachers

who no longer follow sound doctrine,

rabid dogs who know not truth

nor allow others to follow its path,

fading mists speaking vain words

for itching ears to hear,

let me walk in Your light,

let me live in Your love,

let Your will be done

forever.

In the End

Jesus looked directly at them and asked, “Then what is the meaning of that which is written: ‘The stone the builders rejected has become the capstone’? Everyone who falls on that stone will be broken to pieces, but he on whom it falls will be crushed.”  Luke 20:17-18

“What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?”              Mark 8:36-37

When I was 18,

I was the real deal,

the high school, jock, superstar,

the golden boy

with the golden touch,

class president,

everything to everyone;

it was an image,

I spent most of my adolescent years

perfecting.

I could have married the hometown girl,

bought a house in my parents neighborhood,

spent the next 30 or 40 years

making a comfortable living,

gathering after work at the local bar

with all the other hometown boys,

living off old press clippings

and exaggerated sexual conquests,

collecting interest on Friday night touchdowns

and Saturday morning hangovers;

instead I did everything I could

to kill who and what I was.

I wandered,

I searched,

I smoked,

I drank,

I snorted,

I embarrassed,

I lied,

I deceived;

I failed;

I burned every bridge,

I slept with whores,

I broke man-made laws

and spiritual taboos,

I sinned against man,

I sinned against God,

I did everything possible

to commit personality suicide.

But in the end,

I was still here,

stuck in the same skin,

unable to escape,

unable to change,

unable to be anything

but what I was,

trapped by the truth

living inside.

In the end,

I became exactly

what I was destined to be,

and You were still there

knocking,

watching;

waiting.

In the end,

You put Your arms around me,

quietly whispering:

“Don’t be afraid, just believe”  (Mark 5:36)

forgiving the suffering,

forgiving the humiliation,

forgiving the beatings,

forgiving the pain,

forgiving the torture,

forgiving the isolation

endured by You;

for the evil committed by me.

In the end,

You forgave the sins

of a world not worthy

to kiss the dust beneath Your feet.

In the end,

You shined Your light before me

and my eyes were blind no more.

In the end,

I will stand before the throne of Your glory

and the joy shall be forever.

Do Not Be Afraid

You are my child,

I have loved you from the moment

you were created in the womb,

I will always love you,

I will always be beside you,

I will see you through every trial,

I will hold your hand

through every test;

I will be with you forever.

I know there are things

that you do not understand,

I know that you are frightened and confused,

I know there are things that do not make sense,

things that are beyond your ability to comprehend,

I know how you were formed,

I know you better than you know yourself,

I know your weakness,

I know your strength,

I know what you can withstand

and what you cannot;

there are some things

in which you must simply

put your trust in Me.

Turn to me

and I will give you comfort,

seek me with all  your heart

and you will find me.

You are my dear, precious child

who I have loved

from the moment of creation,

do not be afraid,

just believe;

for I am with you

always.

I Am Ready Lord

Old friends return,

wooing, soothing,

inviting, cajoling;

standing just outside the door,

hiding among the dark angry shadows,

waiting for the show to begin,

patiently biding their time;

all night diners,

endless cups of coffee,

lonely highway lines,

empty roads leading nowhere;

how far is the bottom?

where do the lies end?

where does truth begin?

Emotional roller coaster rides,

painful days and nights,

forgotten dreams,

silent memories;

who cares?

All I ever wanted was for someone

to recognize the pain,

someone to understand the depth,

someone to salute the effort,

but no one ever does;

no one but You.

Don’t let me fall Lord,

hold me above the killing zone,

keep me safe from the slaughter below.

I hear Your precious voice;

I am ready Lord,

I am ready;

all I want is to belong to You,

all I need is You;

I am ready Lord,

I am ready.

All Things

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.                                Philippians 4:11-13

Through You

I am strong,

through You

I am alive,

through You

I am a son

of the living God;

through You

I can do all things.

In times of joy,

in times of sorrow,

You are there,

opening my eyes,

guiding my paths,

within You

I have all that I need,

within You

I shall not want,

within You

I am more than I am.

You teach me

to be patient,

You show me

how to be better,

You renew my strength

when there is no strength

to be found.

Holy Father

fill me with the fire

of Your magnificent spirit,

remove anything not of You,

recreate me in Your glorious image,

make me a son

in which You may take pride;

Father,

bring me home to You.

Sanctuary

The touch returns,

the cold black night closes in,

dogs return to their vomit,

sows freshly cleaned

wallow in the mire once again,

am I really so far,

will I ever escape

from these prison walls

surrounding me now?

And yes now I see,

now I know

just how far it goes,

just how costly it becomes,

what fools we are;

trapped within snares

of our own doing.

I see my life play out,

I remember all the wrong decisions,

I relive all the wasted opportunities,

I count up all the lost minutes;

and I am so tired.

The darkness waits

once more,

thick and black,

silently enveloping my soul;

does no one see?

does no one know?

does no one care?

Everything fades,

everything passes by

like shadows in the night,

everything changes

with the morning dawn,

Save me O Lord,

let me rest in Your powerful arms,

let me find sanctuary

within Your sacred walls;

bring me home to You.

Without You

I am so undeserving,

I am so unworthy;

puffed up pride

seeking its own glory,

self-centered ideas and thoughts

full of vanity and iniquity,

lips dripping with venomous hate

spewing words of anger and hurt;

without You

there is no hope,

without You

I am so lost and alone;

when will it end Lord?

See my wretched life,

remember how I was formed,

help me live

with the frustration,

give me strength

to overcome the hopelessness,

lead me through this

valley of darkness and desperation,

free me from this prison of flesh;

hold me in Your arms

forever.

The pain in my body

becomes more

than I can bear,

the weariness to much

to overcome,

as I try to rise up

once more;

and I cannot live

if I live without You,

I cannot make it one more day

without You;

my life is nothing

without You.

So Shall I

It gets harder everyday,

sometimes it feels as though

my bones are on fire,

half the time

I’m not sure if the pain is

physical, mental or spiritual;

or maybe a combination

of all three.

I know it’s the diabetes,

it’s getting serious now,

no more fooling around,

no more slight inconvenience,

it has become the monster

all the experts said it would,

a crazed killer

without conscious,

a psychopathic beast

who knows neither mercy

or compassion,

devouring everything

in its path.

Sometimes I just want

to get a bottle of whiskey,

take a few percocettes

with some Billy Gibbons guitar

playing on the headphones,

make the pain melt away,

drift off into the fog,

never come back,

sometimes I just want to

make it stop,

physically, mentally

and spiritually;

so easy,

so final.

But that would be the easy way,

the path of least resistance,

the broad gate,

the road that leads to destruction;

He is worth more than that.

In the evening darkness

I search for His light,

in the morning silence

I listen for His voice,

He is there by my side,

giving me strength

when there is none,

picking me up

when I am down,

He will not let me fail,

He will not let me give up,

He has defeated this world,

and through Him;

so shall I.

Darkness

And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth?    Luke 18:7-8

Darkness,

all my life I have known darkness,

I have flirted with it,

I have danced with it,

I have felt its intoxicating touch,

I have watched it destroy

innocent, naive fools,

I have seen it claim victims

without mercy or remorse.

Darkness,

yes I know darkness,

I have seen its cruelty,

I have known its calculating coldness,

I have hid in the shadows

as it silently passed by,

I have stood at the edge

of its endless abyss

staring into the eternal blackness,

I have been an unwitting

and unsuspecting witness to its

terrible and irreversible effects,

I have survived when so many others

did not.

Yes I have known darkness,

I have seen its writhing, invisible tentacles

slowly spreading across society,

quietly planting seeds of doubt,

secretly robbing the world of faith,

steadily dousing the light,

surely and confidently

waiting for the end.

Soon the darkness shall be no more,

evil shall no longer exist,

the world shall be free,

the light will shine once again,

every tear shall be wiped away,

He who testifies to these things says “Yes I am coming soon.”

Amen. Come, Lord Jesus.     Revelations 22:20

Damaged

To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me.  Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me.  But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”  Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.

                                                                                                II Corinthians 12:7-10

It’s not easy

accepting that you are

permanently damaged,

a cripple,

handicapped,

less than normal;

less than a man.

That you’ll never run again,

never move freely again,

never be fast and agile again,

never be without pain,

never be without suffering;

never be without hardship.

Yes it’s not easy

but you adjust,

you get by,

you take more pills

for the pain,

you learn to move slower,

you accept the inevitable,

you patiently wait for the

collapse,

all the time knowing,

it’s only flesh and blood,

only bone and nerve endings,

only a temporary illusion;

here today,

gone tomorrow.

You think about old girlfriends,

you think about memories

from the past,

you remember 55 yard touchdown runs

and inside the park homeruns,

you remember doing things

others can only dream about,

and you come to the realization

that all-in-all, it’s been a pretty

fair deal,

nothing to cry over,

nothing to be bitter about,

just another speed bump

along the way,

one more trial,

one more test;

one more obstacle

to overcome.

You remember the words

of the apostle Paul,

you remember that he too

toiled and suffered,

you remember that there are things

much bigger in this life,

much more important

than the bodies in which

we are housed;

that power is made perfect

in weakness.

Thank you Jesus,

for Your magnificent

mercy and grace,

thank You for my life,

thank You for making me

a son of the living God,

thank You for the peace and joy

You have placed within my heart,

thank You for the suffering and sacrifice

endured by You for me,

thank You for being my Lord,

thank You for being my King;

thank You for being my Everything.

Look Down On Me Lord

Look down on me Lord,

see the weakness,

witness the weariness,

understand the pain,

hear the depression,

feel the frustration;

see this burning desire

to belong to You.

So many answers,

so little truth,

remove this sadness

living inside,

make perfect

the imperfection,

take away the lust

and temptation,

fill me with Your peace;

heal the damage done.

O my Lord,

everything fades but You,

all are false but You,

You and You alone

are life and truth,

You and You alone

are the holy King of the universe,

let Your love and light

guide my crooked path,

let me walk in the shadow

of Your wondrous

mercy and grace,

lead me to living waters

that never cease,

deliver me from the evil

lurking just outside,

overwhelm me with Your

marvelous love,

teach me how to become

a son of the living God;

praise Your holy name forever!

Completely

In the night

I remember places

where I have been,

I remember forgotten things,

small things,

things which only

You know,

and I feel Your wondrous touch,

Your magnificent mercy and grace.

All my life

You have led me

to this moment,

and now I am ready,

now I can comprehend,

now I am Yours completely,

now I will belong to You

forever.

Do not let me be a well

without water,

do not let me be a dark angry cloud

within the approaching tempest,

do not let me walk down paths

leading to death,

do not let me be pious

for piety sake.

Let me be a living spring

from which all may drink,

like a mighty raging river

let Your unconditional love

flow from within,

as a brightly blazing beacon

set upon a hill for all to see,

let Your marvelous light shine forth,

fill me with the splendor

of Your precious spirit,

allow me to be a messenger

of Your glory and truth.

Jesus,

praise Your holy and beautiful name,

my King, my God, my Savior

my Everything.

In the Morning

In the morning,

I remember a simpler time,

a sweeter life,

warm Florida mornings

with air so pure

you could taste the promise

in every breath,

but none of it compares

with You.

Who can speak of Your

wondrous glory and light?

what words can describe

the magnitude of

Your mercy and grace?

what sounds may be uttered

that reflect the majesty

of Your perfect love?

Rain Your spirit down on me,

open my mind and eyes,

illuminate my soul,

let me find the words

which glorify

Your holy name.

Lead me

when I am blind,

remind me

when I forget,

show me

that without You

I am lost,

without You

I can do nothing at all.

Restore the joy,

remove the darkness,

heal the damage,

open my eyes,

fill me with Your love,

let me shine

with Your light;

bring me home

to You.

Everything I Need

Walking in the darkness

the pain grows stronger,

becoming more

than I think my body can bear,

with every breath, with every step,

You teach me the value of mercy,

You show me the price of suffering.

You are the potter,

I am just the clay,

even though I have nothing,

with You I have everything I need.

This body fades,

time turns everything into rust,

being with You is all that matters,

walking with You all that I desire,

glorifying Your name my only purpose,

serving You my only mission.

You are the potter,

I am just the clay,

even though I have nothing,

with You I have everything I need.

Lord I am so close,

look down on me now,

see the humility of my heart,

know the sorrow contained within,

remove the darkness,

save me from the sadness,

fill me with Your love,

lift me into Your arms;

every hour,

every minute,

every second,

everything I have,

belongs to You.

You are the potter,

I am just the clay,

even though I have nothing,

with You I have everything I need.

A Dark Day

Thus saith the LORD, thy redeemer, and he that formed thee from the womb, I am the LORD that maketh all things; that stretcheth forth the heavens alone; that spreadeth abroad the earth by myself; That frustrateth the tokens of the liars, and maketh diviners mad; that turneth wise men backward, and maketh their knowledge foolish;

                                                                                                            Isaiah 44:24-25

Today was a dark day

rainy and cloudy,

windy and cold,

gloomy and sinister;

all day long.

I felt like I wanted

to do something,

but I didn’t know what,

sometimes it feels

as though this is the

story of my life;

dark days and

not knowing what

to do.

I saw a specialist yesterday

about my herniated disk,

he suggested trying a nerve block

to relieve the pain,

he doesn’t know if it will work,

but it beats the alternatives,

so I’m going to go with it.

I watched a show about Hitler

on the military channel,

it was about his rise to power

and the extraordinary events

which took place to make it happen,

it almost seemed supernatural,

which is exactly what it was,

monsters like him

only exist because God allows it.

While watching the thought occurred

that his whole purpose for existence

was to put the Jewish people

through a great refining trial

before being allowed

to return to their homeland,

and that perhaps

the whole purpose of America

becoming a nation

almost 200 years earlier,

was to make it possible

for Hitler’s eventual defeat

and pave the way

for God’s chosen people

to return to their promised land,

just like perhaps

the purpose of the Roman Empire

was to provide the method by which

fulfillment of a 700 year old prophecy

of the Messiah dying on a tree

could be fulfilled,

and that the subsequent news

of His resurrection could be spread

throughout the known world of the time,

through the technology of Roman roads

and transportation systems;

perhaps?

Of course, I’m sure

scholars and experts,

those so much wiser than I,

would laugh at such a notion,

but then it wouldn’t be

the first time

God has used seemingly

unrelated and unimaginable plans

to confound the wise and knowledgeable;

would it?

Who would have thought

that a rag tag band of uneducated

fishermen and peasants,

would confound and confuse

the educated and wise men of their day

by witnessing and testifying

to the greatest event

in the history of mankind?

Who could have imagined it?

Creature

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come.                                                                                            2 Corinthians 5:17

No longer the same,

no longer a slave

of this flesh driven body,

no longer a victim,

no longer trapped

by fear and death,

something different;

a new creation.

Born of the spirit,

a foreigner

walking in a foreign land,

a child of light

called out from the darkness,

a chosen vessel;

a son of God.

Let me walk

in Your holy righteousness,

teach me how to grow,

fill me with Your endless love,

guide my steps

down the paths

which lead home

to You.

Knowledge of God

O the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! how unsearchable are his judgments, and his ways past finding out! For who hath known the mind of the Lord? or who hath been his counsellor? Or who hath first given to him, and it shall be recompensed unto him again? For of him, and through him, and to him, are all things: to whom be glory for ever. Amen.                                         Romans 11:33-36

Wandering alone,

destroyed by the moment,

overcome by the magnitude,

afraid of the consequences;

eternally gone.

I have fallen short,

I have been less,

I have not been

all that You created

me to be.

I don’t comprehend the reason,

I can’t explain the why,

I only know through You

it will all work out

in the end.

Without suffering and pain

there would be no relief,

without sadness and sorrow

there would be no happiness and joy,

without darkness and evil

there would be no light and righteousness;

and without You

there would be no hope.

Thank you Lord,

rebuke me when I am wrong,

discipline me as a beloved son,

praise Your holy name,

to You belongs the glory

to You shall I belong

forever.

You Who Are My King

Without You,

the words no longer

have meaning,

without You,

the world is dark and cold,

without You,

there is no meaning,

without You,

there is no purpose.

You have led me

through the land of shadows

where hope does not exist,

You have brought me up

from the depths and pits

of death and despair,

You have saved me

from the destruction

of my wayward ways.

To You

does everything belong,

in You

will I place my hope and trust,

through You

shall I be redeemed;

You who are my King,

You who are my Lord,

You who I shall serve

forever.

You Are All There Is

From this time many of his disciples turned back and no longer followed him. “You do not want to leave too, do you?” Jesus asked the Twelve. Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. We believe and know that you are the Holy One of God.”                                            John 6:66-69

Dark clouds on the horizon,

the storm rapidly approaches,

no escape, no where left to run;

eventually the end

catches us all.

Within Your sanctuary

I seek shelter,

You are my safe haven,

You are my only refuge,

to You alone do I run;

You are all there is.

Time grows short,

soon there will be

nothing left,

I wait for the day,

I long to be

where You are,

there is nothing else,

I cannot escape

even if I wanted to;

You are all there is.

Lord, I am so lost,

I am so blind,

I am so hopeless,

I am so pathetic,

I am so helpless,

without You

I am nothing;

You are all there is.

You teach me truth,

cutting through all

the hypocrisy and hate,

giving the example;

You are all there is.

Bring Me Home to You

Stay with me Father,

hold my head above the fray,

protect me from unseen enemies,

let my eyes see the light

of one more day;

lead me through this darkness,

help me to make a stand,

for I have forsaken Your

wisdom and righteousness,

I have wandered far

from Your protective hand;

bring me home to You Lord,

bring me home to You.

Never let me go,

never let me forget,

that for You all things are possible,

that there is nothing You do not know,

that there is nothing You cannot do;

bring me home to You Lord,

bring me home to You.

When hope has died

and tomorrow seems so far away,

You are there like a mighty beacon of light,

gently leading the way;

bring me home to You Lord,

bring me home to You.

This world deceives even the best,

the deceit and lies bring down

even the strongest,

without You there is no hope,

without You there is nothing;

bring me home to You Lord,

bring me home to You.

Praise You above all others,

praise You with every voice,

praise You with every breath;

praise You forever.

Ready

I search for answers and truth

among the shadows and fringes,

I travel through this land

of dying dreams and false hopes,

and no matter where I turn

it always comes back to You;

You are every answer,

You are every truth,

You are all I need.

When nothing seems right,

when the light no longer shines,

when the whole world comes crashing in,

You are there

like a cool springtime breeze,

when no one hears,

when no one cares,

You stand by my side

closer than a brother;

the King who laid down His life

to save a wretched piece of filth

like me.

In this life I have become a joke,

a fool without hope,

a lost ship tossing and turning

upon raging ocean waves,

look inside and see the sincerity,

see the passion,

see the desire,

see the love.

I am ready Lord,

ready to do Your will,

ready to belong to You

ready to come home to You.

Make my life fruitful,

make me a well from which

living waters flow;

make me a son

in whom a father

may take pride.

A Long Road

I think I am ready,

yes, this time

I think I am finally ready,

it has been a long road,

full of humiliation and degradation,

holding back at the hypocrisy,

turning the other cheek to the self-righteous,

listening to the babble of fools,

remaining silent

in the face of man-made knowledge

and wisdom;

it has been a long road.

I hear Your voice,

softly calling

in the middle of the night,

asking if I am ready

to let go,

asking if I am ready

to follow;

and yes,

this time I think

I am finally ready.

Lord, stay with me now,

stay with me forever,

reach out

and touch me

with Your blessed hand,

heal my wounds,

forgive my transgressions,

open my eyes,

fill me with Your light,

guide my paths,

overflow my cup,

restore my soul;

bring me home to You.

All I Really Want

The world as we know it

is ending,

all the fear,

all the worry,

are becoming reality.

My life goes by;

I eat,

I sleep,

I work,

I laugh,

I scream,

I find fault,

I point fingers,

I criticize,

I am right,

I am wrong,

I am filthy rags,

I am nothing;

all I really want

is You.

Look down on me now,

see the hope

growing inside,

see what no one else

can see,

see beyond the façade,

see beneath the veneer,

see that all I really want;

is You.

Reach out Your mighty hand,

pull me from this pit,

save me from the enemy

waiting to conquer and destroy,

remove all the iniquities and impurities,

help me rise above the stench and filth,

let all the world see;

that all I really want

is You.

Just One More Breath

I am tired of living a life

in a world where nothing really matters,

whose only function is self-satisfaction,

where goodness is measured

in terms of self-indulgence and self-glorification,

and success by total net worth;

I am tired of a life

without You.

I think about

how wonderful it will be

when I am where You are at,

no more worry,

no more fear,

no more disappointment,

no more turmoil,

no more struggle,

no more doubt.

I think about

how I long to leave this life behind,

step out of this fleshly prison

and walk into Your waiting arms,

but then I remember

how you lived Your life for me

without ever once thinking of Yourself,

struggling and sacrificing

through the agony and pain,

bearing the isolation and shame,

giving up Your life that I might live,

and I realize that You deserve

every minute of my life,

every thought, every action, every breath,

that You and You alone are my Lord and King,

that You have so much more for me to do,

so many things left unfinished,

so much wasted time to make up for,

so I ask for just one more breath,

that I might serve You,

just one more breath

that Your name might be glorified;

just one more breath

that I might breathe it

for You.

My Cup Runneth Over

In the quiet

of the slowly setting sun,

lie answers hidden so deep,

far from knowing eyes

or understanding minds;

there are stories

no man can tell,

there are places

no man can go.

You looked for the light

but it was only darkness

which you found,

you searched for redemption

yet it was only condemnation

that you deserved.

And yes there are stories

that no man can tell,

and there are places

where no man can go,

but still you held on,

waiting for an uncertain future,

following unsettled clues,

living without validity,

settling for pennies on the dollar,

surrendering to an enemy

already defeated,

making a home in the middle

of celestial wastelands.

I dreamed dreams,

wrestled with demons,

witnessed angels,

ran from the blackness

of the approaching night,

faced the wrath of an undeniable truth,

now I finally belong to You,

what more could I ask for?

what more could I ever need?

My cup runneth over,

surely goodness and mercy shall follow me

for all my days,

and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord

forever.

Sitting in a Mall While Growing Old

“For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it.  What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul?”                                                                            Matthew 16:25-26

“The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.”                                                John 12:25

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son. This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he as done has been done through God.”

                                                                                    John 3:16-21

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”               John 16:33

It’s not easy growing old,

but then again

it’s not so bad either,

there’s a calm sort of peace

sitting on a bench

in the middle of the mall,

drinking a cup of coffee,

watching people pass you by,

knowing that it will soon be

all over.

You start to see the egotistical ness

in it all,

for the first time

you begin to understand

the futility;

and it’s just not so bad.

The curtain is pulled back,

the illusion disappears,

the Holy Spirit speaks

and you realize:

nothing of this world matters,

that everything is temporary,

everything is changing,

yet everything remains the same,

that there is a truth much larger

than life or death,

all the selfishness, pride, ego, emotions,

feelings, lust, fear, anger, frustrations, greed,

are just a bunch of

self-absorbed hypocrisy,

coming and going,

growing and dying,

fading with each passing moment

of time.

We fail

because we choose it,

drowning in the madness,

running from the light,

blaming it on destiny,

making friends

with the prince of this world,

wallowing in our self-pity,

crying at the hopelessness,

preferring the darkness;

hiding from the truth.

Without Jesus there is nothing,

He is the vine

and we are the branches,

the beginning and the end,

the Alpha and the Omega,

the great I am,

the Truth, the Light

and the Way,

through Him are all things possible,

and no man cometh to the Father

but through Him;

praise His holy name forever!

Greater

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

                                                                                                            Romans 8:37

Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”                                                                                             Matthew 19:26

You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in  you is greater than the one who is in the world.                            I John 4:4

I awake in the middle

of the dark and silent night,

helpless and afraid,

surrounded by the still and quiet depths,

overcome by the worries and cares,

reminded of an uncertain tomorrow,

fearful of all that lies beyond my control,

then You softly speak,

filling me with Your love,

overwhelming me with Your grace,

cleansing me of sin,

restoring my soul,

reminding me that I will never be alone;

that with You there is no condemnation,

no rejection.

I sometimes wonder

just where this road is leading,

and I know no matter what lies ahead

You will see me through,

You will be by my side,

You will provide a way,

through every trial,

through every test,

You are there,

holding me up

when I can no longer stand,

providing strength

when there is nothing left;

through You I am more than a conqueror,

through You all things are possible,

through You I am greater than the world.

Agendas

Sometimes it becomes hard

separating friends from foes,

good intentions from bad;

truth from lies.

In a world ruled by flesh,

humility is sometimes replaced by pride,

issues clouded by agendas,

clarity overcome by confusion;

egotism and self-glorification

hidden within the face of love.

You have witnessed it all;

every dark, angry thought,

every sinister, evil plot,

every treacherous betrayal,

every late night denial;

remaining silent at the accusations,

withstanding the pain and lies,

loving when there was no love in return,

giving when there was nothing left to give,

forgiving when you had every right to hate,

walking the path

that no one else could;

sacrificing yourself

for the sake of the whole world.

Lord, I have nothing worthy of You,

I am but filthy rags in Your presence,

fit only for death and destruction,

Your love goes beyond my comprehension,

Your mercy more than I could ever deserve,

help me to forgive those with selfish motives

and hidden agendas,

help me to love those who do not deserve my love;

help me to be like You.

Never Been To Prison

Are not five sparrows sold for two farthings, and not one of them is forgotten before God? But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows.                                       Luke 12:6-7

For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.                                                                                                Ephesians 6:12

Never been to prison,

but I feel like

I’ve been behind bars

since the day I was born,

never seen the desert,

but I think I have been

planning the trip

all my life,

now my life

is almost over,

dried up

like an abandoned well,

a gentle mist,

a fog shrouded vapor,

see it fade,

see it change,

see it rearrange,

movement becomes hard,

pain a way of life,

everything is gone,

everything is different;

everything is new;

we reap what we sow

and I have sown the seeds

of perversion,

wallowed in the ways of lust,

fulfilled the desires of the flesh,

reveled in the excesses,

partook of the debauchery,

delighted in the thrills,

lived for the moment,

searched for forbidden fruit;

I deserve nothing.

All my life

I have lived in worlds of fantasy,

trapped by delusions and

non-existent details,

all my life

I have flirted with madness

and disasters beyond

mere magnitudes of mortality,

I have searched for finality,

witnessed untold destruction,

forever knowing,

continually waiting

for moments that came

and went like liquid glass;

the night belongs to those

who have nothing else.

Sadness is an art

known by only a few,

understood by none,

without beginning or end,

without mercy or compassion,

techniques and classifications

have no hold here,

no amount of money

can buy membership here,

words can save,

words can kill;

turn around

before it is too late;

once more

the darkness closes in,

once more

the abyss lies ahead,

calling, beckoning, caressing;

save me Lord……………!

In the morning

Your voice softly speaks,

telling me not to fear,

reminding me that You see

everything I do,

that not even a sparrow falls

without Your knowledge,

and that I am worth more

than many sparrows,

proving that You are real,

bringing peace

to my troubled mind,

removing the chaos and confusion,

lighting up the darkness;

thank you Lord.

Help me overcome

the spiritual darkness,

help me remember

that the arrogance and hypocrisy

of others will pass,

help me turn the other cheek

when I am attacked,

silence my lips before they utter

foolish words of vanity and evil,

teach me to control this flesh

seeking only self-fulfillment

and self-preservation,

remove anything

that is not of You,

let others see You through me;

let me be a son

of the living God.

Thank you Lord

I cannot make it without You,

I cannot live without You,

I cannot breath without You,

You are my King,

You are my Lord;

You are my EVERYTHING!!!!